Category: control

Am I a victim or do I have a choice?

That may seem like a simple question, but I don’t think it is, and here’s why.

It feels to me that the world tries to fill our heads with strong opinions about this and reinforces the whole idea of victimhood. So much so that it may be our first reaction. We simply accept ourselves as the victims of our circumstances.

When I sit back for a moment, I realize this may even be our default setting, an immediate prescribed reaction to events we encounter.

I wonder, how can this possibly benefit us?

My first thought is, it’s an easy escape. We don’t have to be held accountable and there’s usually someone else to blame. We don’t have to take any responsibility or even make changes to fix things.

We’re simply off the hook. After all, we’re the victim, aren’t we?

This whole thought process bothers me to my core. I understand why we might gravitate to this way of thinking, but to me no one is served by it. Not really.

I do not believe I came here to this earth to be a powerless victim of my own thinking or because of someone else’s actions.

Of course, I realize there are things outside my control. Lots of them. And many of them create situations I’d rather not experience. But that doesn’t mean I am powerless.

In fact, once it becomes obvious to me that I’m falling into the grips of victimhood, that’s the time for conscious decision making.

This starts with a giant step back and some deep breathing.

I need to take a wide view of the situation and truly consider all of the choices available to me.

I’m sure there are many ways to evaluate before choosing a path forward and everyone ought to use the one that offers them the best outcome- the one that works to achieve their ultimate benefit.

The question may be- how?

I have a suggestion you might want to consider.

Hang on, because it comes from a surprising place. As some of you know, I have certain recollections about heaven. I remember things and one of them is the ceremony that centered around me before I came to earth. During the ceremony I created a framework, a basic plan of things I wanted to experience. I think of it as my spiritual DNA. It remains flexible throughout my earth life, so I am able to make any changes I desire.

When I was constructing this basic plan, I chose to live in the world and be impacted by my cultural training, BUT I also chose to retain the ability to choose what best served me, despite what my culture believed.

In a way it doesn’t really matter if you decide to believe me about remembering heaven, because we all end up in this same place having to decide what path best suits us.

What I am suggesting is that we do not have to accept the ‘victim’ role. It is an option, not a requirement. It’s a choice.

We can acknowledge its presence, but give ourselves permission to make a better choice, one that serves our immediate and long-term aims.

I feel all decisions are open to me. I may not always like the immediate outcomes, but I do still have a choice, and I believe that it is always possible to find a wonderful path forward.