What Writing My Own Obit Taught Me

Have you ever wondered about the marvelous truths that could be revealed by one simple act of writing? In this case, I’m talking about writing your own obituary notice.

Okay, let me explain.

I know this may sound a little crazy and you needn’t be concerned because, in order to write your own obit, you have to be alive, so all is well. What I want to share with you is that this can be an incredible celebratory experience, quite the contrary to what you might be imagining.

I’ll start at the beginning.

Several years ago, I attended a workshop at the Kripalu Center in Lenox, Massachusetts. Our class was given a number of challenging writing assignments. Writing your own obit was not one of them, but the material we covered generated a spark that led me to consider the idea.

I didn’t do it right away. It felt too threatening somehow, so I filed it for later consideration. But like so many things in life that beg for attention, it wouldn’t sit still. So, after a few weeks of trying to ignore it, I gave in.

Because of what I discovered, I’m very glad that I did.

Many things became clearer to me about my life. The first one is that many obits focus on how a person died rather than how they lived. It isn’t as important to me how I leave this world, but I care deeply about how I live while I am here, and I would want others to know something about me. Writing gave me a chance to do a life review and choose some meaningful events and I had an absolutely wonderful time sorting through my memories and soaking up the joy.

Several obits I encountered concentrated on lengthy lists of milestones and life achievements. I wondered; did this truly give value to the person’s life?

What I decided to write about were all the moments of celebration that occurred during my life. The events that gave my life deep meaning and connected me with others. I realized I had lots of my own milestones and a host of noteworthy accomplishments, but they all paled in comparison with the simple moments of sharing with the people I held dearest.

Another aspect of most obits is the listing of relatives who either passed away before the person or who survived them. They are often shown in chronological order and seem, at least to me, somewhat perfunctory. What I decided was to list everyone who brought heart-felt meaning into my life. I wanted to acknowledge them and tell them how much they meant to me. Listing everyone was an intensely beautiful experience for me and I glowed for weeks thinking about so many things we’d shared.

This self-assigned task also provided me with another shift in focus. I noticed a tendency to consider that a life could be defined by a list of the things a person accumulates during their earthly existence. A house, cars, artwork, seasonal property, bank and brokerage accounts, jewelry, titles, memberships. When I started thinking about this, I gravitated to the exceptional opportunities I encountered in my life that led me to deep spiritual connections with others. It became an adventure in cherishing experiences and releasing my attachment to things.

I also realized that the purpose of the money I earned or was given was that it allowed me to trade it for the value of worldly experiences, especially when others were involved. Others who at first were acquaintances, then friends, then kin to me (those I loved the most).

I found this writing exercise to be life changing because it allowed me to alter my perspective and see life as one continual celebration of events.

I wonder, if you chose to accept this assignment, if you would find that true as well.

Profound Puddles in Your Life

Tell me, have you fallen lately? I don’t mean this literally. I mean, have you taken a step that you thought would lead you forward, only to find you missed your goal completely, and maybe landed in one of life’s puddles.

When I was in Junior High School, I went out for the tennis team. It was going to be a stretch for me to make the squad, but I thought it might be good for me. Well, that’s not entirely true. My parents thought it would be good for me.

When I got there, seven other guys were waiting for the coach to arrive. We lined up and were assigned to four courts and told to volley with a partner. The coach watched us for a while, then asked us to gather around for his decision.

I’d made the team, he told me. I was pretty enthusiastic about it, that is until I discovered everybody who showed up made the team.

Over the next couple of practices, we all played against each other to establish our ranking. The top ranked player was number one of course. When our names were posted I scanned down the list. There I was, I’d been assigned as player number eight. Well, nowhere to go but up, I thought.

Every day after school we’d head out to the courts for practice and matches. When the weather was great, everything went along nicely. But often the courts would be full of puddles from our frequent rain showers, and we’d be forced to push the water off them, using long poles with wide flat rubber heads. They were supposed to clear the surface. They didn’t and we would have to do our best to play around the more obstinate puddles.

I don’t know if you’ve ever played tennis on a court with puddles, so I’ll give you some insight. When a fast-moving tennis ball hits a puddle, it skids wildly. There is no predicting which direction it will travel and it’s a rare thing to be able to return the ball back over the net. Not only that, striking a soggy tennis ball is like hitting a grapefruit.

Fortunately, practices were short those days.

As a side note, I eventually moved up to number six, but never played against kids from other schools, since only the top four played official matches. Actually, this was okay with me.

Over the course of my life, I’ve discovered that the tennis court is not the only place that has puddles.

The puddles I’m talking about now are those that potentially await us all. The death of someone close to us, an intense physical challenge, a financial set back, a string of endless arguments, the loss of a job, an accident, or the end of an important relationship.

They don’t happen every day, but you never really know when they’ll appear. Some days I feel surrounded by them. And some of them are quite deep.

Maybe you’ve stepped in a few yourself.

So, what do we do when confronted by life’s challenging puddles?

We have a lot of choices. We can swear at them and blame everyone and everything around us. I do this occasionally, even though I know it isn’t helpful. In those weak moments, I try to give myself some slack. I try to stand as far away from my circumstances as I can and be an observer, hoping the distance gives me better perspective. If I am kind to myself, I can see more clearly and often find some value within the experience.

Other times, I am able to adapt to the puddles I fall into. It’s not that I enjoy them, but I don’t resist them as much, which makes it a lot easier on me. I try to accept that difficulties happen to everyone and that there is almost always a pathway out. I try to shift my thinking away from my anger or resentment and toward solutions and growth. It doesn’t always work, but it’s a lot better than remaining in the puddle.

On my best days, I go inside myself. I rest for a while and slow down. I remind myself that everything that happens in my life is there to serve me in some fashion if I’ll only take the time to look closely and listen to my heart. Finding the beautiful message opens my world and allows me to release any unhelpful thoughts.

When I do this, I don’t mind running along and jumping in the puddles.

Sounds of Life

I’m curious about the sounds of life. We live in such an active world with so much noise and I wonder how often we give ourselves a chance to stand still and listen.

Listen and really hear.

Try it for a minute. I promise it will be worth it.

Close your eyes and release the visible world and slow your breathing so you can deeply listen to the sounds that surround you. How many can you name?

Are you surprised by the variety? Are there sounds you can’t identify?

Certainly, it matters where you are when you try this. We exist in so many different places, big cities, small towns, deserts, rain forests, seashores, all teaming with sounds.

A time long ago hearing and identifying sounds meant life or death. If you were being stalked by a hungry animal, you’d better have good hearing, if you wanted to survive.

In some places, this is as important now as it was long ago, even though the reasons may have changed.

Every so often I will stop what I am doing and try to still my mind. I’ll close my eyes and take in all the sounds I can. Sometimes there are too many for me to separate and I have to open my eyes back up to be able to name them.

I wonder about the sound words make. Folks might say the exact same word, but their inflection, tone, volume, and pronunciation are so different, that it seems it is not the same word at all.

I wonder, is it possible to know every word from every language on earth? How many words are there and why do they all exist? Is there such a variety because they all sound different?

Is it possible to know every sound that we humans are capable of making? And what of our fellow travelers on this earth and the sounds they make? All the creatures on land, in the water and above us in the sky?

What a catalogue that would be to record every sound.

And what of other entities, the trees, rocks, plants, and flowers? Do they have their own sounds and their own language?

I wonder, has every sound already been made or are new sounds created all the time? Is there a sound that was once made, but hasn’t happened in a long time, because what created it is no longer here? I wonder too will there be new sounds in the future?

What is this fascination of mine with sound and what might it have to do with you?

Here’s an idea to try.

Sounds create meaning and they give life depth and dimension.

I love so many sounds. The voices of those that touch my life, the honking of geese as they travel south for winter, the rush of the wind through the green pines, the ding of the food timer because I know something tasty is only a moment away, the infinite variety of music, hearing the heartbeat of a yet unborn child, the roaring of water cascading over a fall, the plaintive sigh of a train whistle, the beauty of laughter.

There are so many more.

My personal favorite though is the sound of my wife’s voice saying, “I love you”. And I have to admit, I love the sound of hearing her adorable wolf howl, when we’re outdoors staring at the full moon.

I encourage you to stop for a moment sometime today and open yourself to the world of sound. It is such a precious gift.

The Anatomy of Success

What was the first thing that came to your mind when you read this post title? Did you actively wonder whether you are a success in the world? Perhaps you began at once to measure and compare yourself to others who you believe are successful.

It can be quite a losing game, if you are not careful.

Maybe it would be good to back-up a bit. After all, what really is success? Do we get to choose our own definition, or do we feel obligated to use those others have created?

I’ve struggled with this concept during my life.

In my early years the expectations which defined success seemed to be easy to grasp. During my school years, it was primarily my test scores and grades and where I stacked up to the others in my classes. Sure, there were other measures, like how skilled you were in sports or music or extracurricular activities.

As time went on there was more friction involved and success became more difficult to achieve. Folks wanted to know what college you got into, what your major was, what your job prospects were, did you have a girlfriend, was it serious?

The focus seemed to be on bigger and better regardless of whether you could classify your actual anticipated outcomes.

That’s part of the problem with success. It slips away as soon as you start to accomplish it. It moves a little further from your grasp and keeps you reaching.

You think to yourself, I’m almost there and then another step appears, another task to check off.

If you are fortunate enough, you move into the business world and search for a job you hope will offer you a decent income, growth potential and a good retirement. You might get married and have children, a house, a car and go on nice vacations.

For some, these are the measures of success that matter most, and by and large, they are the ones society treats with respect.

I wanted all of these, and I am fortunate because they all came into my life. I am deeply grateful for this, for each one of these.

But do they define my success in the world? Can they? Am I not more than these?

What about our other dreams? The ones that live deep inside of us? The ones no one else can see? What about the success of these?

I care about these too.

Do you have some dreams that you want to live outside of yourself? Dreams that you want to shine?

If you do, I encourage you to breathe life into them. I also encourage you to relax all of your ideas about success.

Maybe, if you need to, write down what success would look like if you accomplished them, but then purposely set the list aside. Put it in a safe place and forget about it.

You see, dreams are different. They came with you when you arrived here on earth. They live in you but want to live outside of you. That is their great measure of success. They blossom and bear fruit and share themselves with others, perhaps far beyond your wildest imagination.

This post comes from inside of me in some previously hidden place that I wasn’t aware of until right now. It’s the same place my first book came from when it was born.

I’ve come to realize that I am a channel, a way for my inner dreams to reach the outside world. And I’ve come to realize that I profit by shifting my definition and measures of success. I try to release what the world believes and embrace what feels true to me.

When my dreams take flight, I soar with them, and they are my best version of success.

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Reframing Your Life

Here is a question for you. What if there is only love and fear and nothing else? What if you decided to dive headlong into this question, would you discover that the greater truth is that there is only love?

Maybe you need a moment to think about it. Maybe the presence of fear is so strong that the answer is obvious, that of course there is fear, and so much more. Perhaps you are in the middle of a place of strife, whether that’s inside or outside of you.

It’s possible that fear is the only thing that seems real in this moment. I hope that is not the case for you, but if it is, I hope I have something to say worth your considering.

Recently fear had crept inside of me and was burrowing around, looking for a home. I felt it in the tightness of my chest, and it would not move.

I called out to Lia (one of the names I have for god) and asked for some guidance.

She came and rested inside of me and told me that both love and fear lead in the same direction. She said that love leads directly, while fears takes an indirect path.

I asked what else she could tell me about the path of fear. I wanted the heaviness in my chest to go away. I was worried that things would not turn out the way I wanted them to. I dislike this feeling and wondered how it could be released.

Lia said to me, “Part of the answer lies in trusting. Trusting that ALL paths lead to me. Right now, your sense of discomfort is because you doubt this outcome. You believe that your fears are going to take you down some other path and that you will become lost. You believe your fears will lead you into a world of suffering, pain and sorrow and you want to avoid this.”

She continued, “The truth for you in this moment is that fear feels unavoidable, but you can reframe your life.”

Lia asked me to imagine an ugly frame with a beautiful picture inside. She asked me to imagine that the beautiful picture is not only my life, but the picture of love. The ugly frame surrounding it is fear because that is how I see certain aspects of my life. She told me that the truth is that I can transform fear into love and that the deeper truth is that even fear is beautiful.

I confessed to being mystified.

Lia said, “Part of the truth lies in the mission of fear, its purpose.”

She went on to clarify, “It exists to aid you in your life. It directs you and points the way toward love, as a sure guidepost.”

I wanted to know so much more.

Lia told me that we had taken the first step, which was my willingness to ask and to listen. I’d opened myself up.

I wanted more peace than that and to release the lingering heaviness in my chest.

Lia encouraged me to sit back, close my eyes and to force a few quick breaths from my lungs, then rest.

I did as she requested and there was peace and a new freedom of breathing. And it gave me a chance to consider her words to me.

Am I capable of trusting that any fear that comes to visit me is here to serve me as a guidepost and help direct me back to love? Can I reframe my world, releasing fear and embracing love?

These are important questions to me and they have the ability to shape my whole world. It is up to me where I place my trust and what path I choose to travel. I want the path of love.

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What Other People See

Do you ever wonder what the view is like through someone else’s eyes? It’s likely to be very different, but in what ways? What might we learn about them if we asked, and for that matter, based on the questions we ask, what might we learn about ourselves?

When I was in Junior High School, I discovered that I couldn’t see the blackboard at the front of the room well enough to read it. Clearly this was a problem since the homework assignments for the next day were written there.

Perhaps I need to pause here for a moment. Yes, I am dating myself. Now of course, it’s called Middle School and probably all the assignments are on a Chromebook or other laptop. Although there are always changes, not being able to see well enough remains the same.

At first, I tried to sit closer, but that wasn’t good enough. Even squinting didn’t help. So, I broke down and told my parents and they took me to get my first pair of glasses. I hated wearing them. Still do actually. And yet I need them for seeing anything in the distance.

I am often asked why I don’t wear them all the time. And some folks in my life want to know how I manage to get along not being able to make things out.

I guess that over time I’ve learned ways to adjust. I can usually determine who is in the distance by their gait or mannerisms, but not always. Sometimes I am at a complete loss to identify something or someone.

When this happens, it occurs to me that perhaps everyone has their own version of this.

It seems to me that it’s pretty easy to take things for granted. We only see certain things and miss others. We have blind spots and could use more acute vision. Maybe it would be handy to have an optometrist for our life, who could help us see what others see.

If a friend stopped you the next time they saw you and asked what your life is like, would you be able to help them see it through your eyes? Could you explain why you feel the way you do?

If you asked them to tell you how they see you, what do you suppose they would share? Is it likely that it would match what you see yourself?

Earlier in my life I wrote out a list of adjectives and asked several of my friends to circle the ones they thoughts best described me. It was a bit of a risk because the list included some unfavorable adjectives, ones I hoped they didn’t choose. When I got the completed lists back, I eagerly poured over them. This was a chance to see through someone else’s eyes and to satisfy my own curiosity.

I was surprised by many of their choices. In some cases, it tipped me off balance. I had to stop and think about how I related to each person in order to make sense of their answers.

For me, it was a grand opportunity. I had a choice to make. I could discount their answers and go on thinking that I knew best, or I could yield and accept that their perspectives had merit. That they knew things and saw things about me that I didn’t. I could shift beliefs about myself. And I could change whatever didn’t fit with who I wanted to be in the world.

I think we all have this same chance, if we pay attention. If we listen with an open heart. If we acknowledge that we have vested interests in maintaining our personal story, and yet if we listen carefully when others speak, we might be able to grow wiser.

If we loosen our grip on the image we project into the world, we can evolve and expand. If our eyes are fully open, we can flourish and see with clear vision this beautiful world of ours.

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Standing Out

Do you know anyone who stands out from the crowd? Are you someone who does? If not, do you want to?

It’s funny to me that many folks I know, myself included, want it both ways. We want to stand out and be recognized for being who we are and to have our talents and skills applauded. But then at other times, we want to shrink into the background as far away from the light as possible.

What makes the difference?

How can it be that one experience draws up into the sunshine while another makes us fade into the darkness?

For those of you who don’t see the picture at the top of this post, it’s a stream bed filled with rounded rocks and one gorgeous red leaf in the middle. It’s such an interesting contrast. The muted tones of the smooth rocks against the rich brilliance of autumn color.

The red leaf stands out in sensational glory. My eyes center on it and it pulls me toward its rich redness.

A curious thought runs through my head. Would I notice this amazing leaf if it was among a mass of other red leaves, or would its individual splendor be lost? Perhaps the answer is obvious. I probably wouldn’t have noticed it. It wouldn’t have stood out.

The same is no doubt true about the rocks. Would I have noticed one individual rock among all of the others, if they all looked essentially the same?

So, does this mean that in order to stand out, you have to be different from what’s in the background?

I hope not. I hope that we can each see ourselves as the red leaf. Brilliant, special, unique. I hope that we can see past any limits we or others set in our way.

I wonder, can I? Can you? What would it take for us to answer yes to this question?

Sometimes it’s easy because we all do some things very well. They’re obvious to us and to others. It feels good and we shine.

But, what about the other times? The ones where we fail to meet our own expectations or those of others? The times when we want to vanish from sight?

I want to propose an idea to you.

What if you came to realize that within you there is a hidden greatness? One that could accept any experience previously considered a failure. A greatness that allows you to shift your perspective, turning any perceived failure into a wonderful learning step along your way.

What if this inner magnificence called to you by name and asked you to trust in your divinity? Imagine releasing any doubts and preconceived notions you have about yourself. Imagine knowing you came here already unique, special, and brilliant. And now that you are here, you can spread your wings and fly.

I am telling you the truth as I know it. As always, it’s up to you to decide.

There’s one more thing I want to say.

A dear friend of mine and I had many conversations and always returned to the same singular question she wanted answered.

She wanted to know how I could see inside her or someone else. She wanted to know how I could see past all the ‘stuff’ on the outside, to the inner goodness.

I told her that when I look at someone through my heart, what I see is beautiful golden sparkling glitter floating around them. I pause for a moment, then gently blow it away and see their magnificent heart. Each one beautiful, flawless.

Each of you are beautiful. You each stand out in your own way. I hope you know this.

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Open Doors

Have you ever had a door closed in your face? Whether intentional or not, some emotional pain might be involved.

It might hurt.

Maybe the person didn’t mean to and maybe they did. Either way you have to decide what to do with it. Of course, you could immediately let it go. That would certainly be wise.

You could rationalize it, noting that the person was probably in a hurry at the time or didn’t see you approaching the door. You could give them a pass.

You could tell yourself that it was just a mistake on their part, and everyone makes mistakes, realizing this includes you.

There are other options.

You could get angry and think the person was thoughtless or mean. That they did it on purpose, intending to hurt or annoy you. I’m not sure where the profit in this is though, especially if you carry it with you throughout the rest of your day.

You could use it as an opportunity to exercise patience, compassion, and love. Not only for the person who didn’t hold the door open for you but for yourself. If the door closing sparked an emotional reaction in you, you can choose to immediately forgive the person. And the forgiveness you extend can be all inclusive, so their reason doesn’t matter, whether it was intentional or not.

The beauty of this kind of forgiveness is that it includes YOU. There is no requirement to hold on to any anger or slight you may feel. You simply open your heart and release, moving on with the rest of your day.

Perhaps you’re wondering why the title of this post is, Open Doors, when all I’ve talked about is a Closed Door.

Well, instead of having a door closed on you, have you had doors opened for you? Often kind-hearted people hold a door open for me and I return the gesture. It was part of my cultural training. It was considered a nice thing to do.

In the early part of my life, when I opened a door for someone, I had an expectation that they would say, thank you. That probably only happened about half of the time. I wondered, was this civility not a part of others training?

I had several decisions to make.

The first was whether I would allow the response to dictate my future actions. Would I stop opening doors because I didn’t receive a thank you? The second was a question I had to ask myself. Why was I opening the door for someone?

It seems like such a simple thing. Why should this create a thought-provoking question for me?

Over the course of time, I came to a conclusion. I open the door because I want to, not because I was told it was the right thing to do or so that I will be thanked. I do it because to me it feels like a nice thing to do. Period.

Removing the emotional baggage and releasing the conventional expectations I’d been taught, freed me. In the freedom, I am able to decide what I want. That’s an important place to spend some time.

Here’s another question. When a door opens in your life, let’s call it an opportunity, do you back away, afraid of what might happen?

Or do you take a tentative step forward, hesitant, but curious?

Or maybe you take several bold steps forward, excited by a new prospect.

Open doors are wonderful things. They invite us to take chances and explore. They offer us excitement and challenges. They create pathways for new adventures.

I’m trying to pass by all the closed doors now and walk through all the open doors, knowing they are the way forward. I hope you’ll join me in walking through yours.

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Withholding

What has been withheld from you? Is it food for your body or learnings for your mind or affection and love for your soul?

And can you answer this? What have you withheld from others? Do you keep your heart to yourself? Do you prevent compassion from leaving you? Are you holding things inside that might serve the world?

Even more importantly, what do you withhold from yourself? Do you stifle your dreams? Do you keep yourself small, to avoid detection? Do you push praise away or allow yourself to crumble when adversity comes your way?

These are hard questions and yet so very necessary to live our most magnificent life.

We need so many different things to prosper.

There is a quote from Hal Lindsay, author of the book, The Late Great Planet Earth, where he captures some of the essence of life. “Man (any one of us) can live about forty days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air…but only one second without hope.”

I’m not certain of his facts because I can’t imagine being able to hold my breath for eight minutes, but I understand his critical point. We all need hope to live and if we lose it, nothing seems worth living for.

This is why I believe that it is essential to explore the idea of withholding, whether it is done to us or by us.

No doubt there are lots of reasons why withholding occurs. Things happen in our lives that create patterns, that mold us and shape us. Often, we are not even aware they are happening. They seep in and take hold and become a part of us.

What are we to do?

Of course, this is everyone’s decision. I can only speak for myself, but I know that I want to expand outward into the world and withholding prevents this. I want to freely give and receive. I want to loosen all the ties I attach to the gifts I offer. I want to be centered in love and fill up all the spaces where withholding lives.

It seems to me that I need a way to do this. Something practical.

Perhaps my first step is to become better at recognizing when withholding exists. But how?

I search my mind for an answer. Nothing arrives.

I wonder why. Are we not thinking beings, capable of discovering all sorts of solutions to our problems? Certainly, we are. There must be something, and yet nothing appears. Is this a dead-end?

Then something enters my awareness and I know what to do. I sit back and take in a fresh breath. I close my eyes and wait. I smile, because I know the answers I seek are on their way. In the quiet, I hear an inner voice. It is the voice of my feelings saying, “Let me guide you to your truth.”

I want to know more. A lot more.

So, my feelings continue, “All withholding is a form of protection. It believes that there is ‘not enough’ in the world, so it must impose limits. It relies on everyone to accept this idea, even if only in small doses.”

I feel the truth of this for me, but it seems incomplete. I ask my feelings; is there more you want to share?

“Yes, all withholding attempts to reduce your infinite size, regardless of the direction withholding travels. You are each a majestic, limitless, divine being. You have no innate need to withhold anything from anyone. The truth is you grow richer and stronger and become more vital and alive the more you share.”

“It is not necessary for you to investigate further all the areas in your life where withholding occurs. The solution is far simpler than that. I am the pathway. Being aware of how you feel will guide you. You know this already. So, when feelings of withholding appear, release them, for they are untrue. They can be cast aside, so that your magnificence shows through, and your divine light illuminates the world. Share your hope and your holiness with yourself and with all those in your life. This is how withholding vanishes.”

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When Too Much Light Comes In

Has the world ever appeared too bright to you? Too shiny, too many colors, too overwhelming?

I know this may, at first reading, sound ridiculous, but for some folks it is their truth. They find it difficult to adjust to what others feel is ‘normal’. It’s too much and they are only comfortable with soft rays of light entering their life.

Who are these people, you might ask?

The answer to your question may surprise you, because at times this may apply to everyone. Sometimes we all need a dark room to hide away in, far from the crowd and the spotlight.

A place where we can sit or lay down. A place where there is no noise to distract our circling thoughts. Somewhere to recharge our batteries.

I want to express a hope of mine.

If you sense there is too much light coming into your life, please, please, know that it is okay to separate yourself from the world and look inside, deep into your heart. It’s okay to shut out any harsh lights, whether they are from the sun or from the words and actions of others. It’s even possible there are cruel words you are speaking to yourself.

Let them all fall away.

It’s not that I don’t believe in outside help, because I do. Very much so. I know that outside helpers can reframe things and bring them into sharper focus. They can provide warmth and support and a network. They can allow you space to empty your thoughts and concerns and help create some peace in your world. They can be absolutely wonderful.

What I am saying is there are other ways too. Other resources. And they also have a place in your life, if you want them.

I want to share one of mine with you.

For me she has a name, it’s Lia, which stands for Love In Action. She is an aspect of (god). I place god in parentheses because I want folks to feel free to use their own name for the divine. This is one of the most incredible gifts we have…to be able to use our own name for god. And to be free to embrace a relationship in whatever way feels right to us.

When I am blinded by too much light, I shy away from the world and open to Lia’s presence. The moment I do, she is there. I don’t see her, but I always feel her presence.

Mostly she listens. She knows why I want her, need her, but waits patiently for me to release all that I am carrying. She waits for me to lay it all down. She waits for me to be empty. And ready.

Sometimes it seems like she fades from my presence, but that’s because of me, not her.

She knows I can’t hear her when my head is full. It’s too noisy, too congested, too bright with the shiny things of the world.

I’m so glad that she waits for me.

When I finally run dry, she comes to fill me back up. She gives me heavenly water for my spiritual thirst. She asks me divine questions and my answers to her, are my answers to me.

Does this appeal to you?

Would you like to meet her, know her, have her in your life?

The good news is that you can.

She is only a heartbeat away. One decision on your part and I believe she will appear. She asks little. Only your calm breathing, your quieted voice, your willingness to spend time with her and your open heart. She awaits these things, patiently, lovingly.

Ever since I first met her, she has come to me. Always with love, ever faithful.

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SPECIAL NOTE: If you would like to know more about having a relationship with Lia, please see the BOOKS section of this website and scroll down to my book, talking with (god). Should you wish, you may purchase a print copy or ebook through Amazon.