Category: kindness

Posted on

Act of Kindness- Balloons

This is a story that I created for a contest submission about an act of kindness as told from a different perspective than my own. The part I played is true. I was the balloon man. The rest of the story is told from a small boy, Joey, and his mother, Janice’s perspective. The essence of the contest was to perhaps inspire the reader to perform their own act(s) of kindness. There part is up to you.

Joey looked up into his mother’s eyes and asked the question he’d been carrying around for a while.

“Mommy, why did this happen to me?”

She noticed the start of tears forming in the corners of his eyes, tried to smile at him and did her best to answer.

“I don’t know, honey. Sometimes there aren’t good answers for why things happen to one person and not to another.”

“Is this hard for you, sweetie?”

“Kind of,” he responded, clearing away the tears as they ran down his cheeks.

She was awed by his gently courage and sat next to him remembering the moment in the doctor’s office when the word was first spoken. Cancer.

From then on, it was a blur for her. She was so relieved that Daniel, her husband, was there to pay attention. It’s not that she didn’t want to know, especially since she’d be the one taking care of Joey, since Daniel had to leave again. He’d gotten his orders and had to report soon. Even in a situation like this, wars went on.

“Mommy,” Joey said, interrupting her thoughts, “How long will I be in the hospital this time?”

“Oh, Joey, I’m sorry but I don’t know, The doctors hope it will be shorter than last time, but they’re not sure yet.”

***

After several weeks went by Joey was released from the hospital. His mom, Janice, held his next appointment card in her hand and they left unsteadily for home.

***

“When do we go to Dr. Richard’s office?”, Joey asked.

“We leave in fifteen minutes. Can you go find your stuffed dog, Patches, so we’ll be ready to leave?”

Janice noticed how Joey held his body, hunched forward slightly with his eyes staring down at the floor.

“Are you feeling upset honey?”, she asked, already anxious about his answer.

“A little”, he said, trying to hide the fear he felt inside. Joey smiled crookedly at his mom and turned to look for Patches.

As they headed to the car, Joey tipped his head up and asked, “Mommy, could we do something special after the doctor?”

His eyes pleaded for her to say ‘yes’.

Janice tried to keep from crying, knowing how worrisome this appointment was from both of them, after all the test results were supposed to be in.

She’d promised to call Daniel as soon as they left the doctor’s office, but she wanted to give Joey something to look forward to, if such a thing was possible.

“I hope so, sweetie”, she finally responded.

***

Janice parked the car, helped Joey out of his seat and walked slowly up the staircase and into the medical building. They rounded a corner in the hallway and Joey shrieked with excitement.

“Balloons, Mommy! Can I have one? I really want one, please Mommy?”

The man holding the string of balloons turned toward Joey and smiled.

Janice knelt down next to Joey to be closer to him and said, “Honey, those aren’t our balloons”, She’d hoped to divert his attention and continue to their doctor’s office for his appointment.

Instead of continuing to walk in the opposite direction, the man turned and approached Joey and Janice. He noticed how Joey’s face brightened and how the light in his eyes radiated with the simple pleasure of seeing the balloons, and the possibility of having one for himself.

The man held out the bouquet of balloons and asked, “Which one would you like, if it’s okay with your mom?”

The man held Janice’s eyes, assuring her that he wanted Joey to have his pick.

“The blue one, no, the purple one, oh, I don’t know, they’re all so beautiful”, Joey answered, with unsuppressed joy.

The man smiled and pulled on two strings, releasing them from the bunch and held them out to Joey.

“Let’s make this easy”, the man said, “how about both?”

Joey screamed with delight, took the balloons, then looked at his mom, silently asking for her permission.

Overcome by this simple act of kindness, Janice nodded to her son and quietly thanked the man.

“You have no idea what this means to both of us”, she said.

“I think I do”, the man responded knowingly.

He turned, walked down the hall and entered a Pediatric Doctor’s office where he joyfully released the rest of his bouquet.

End

Note: This was one of my sixty-three intentional acts of kindness that took almost a month to complete. I did this in appreciation for my sixty-third birthday.

Posted on

When Kindness Comes From Joy

Have you ever wondered where kindness comes from? Is it innately inside each one of us or does something need to happen before it appears?

It feels to me that we operate with different definitions and ideas about kindness.

I say this because I recently heard someone suggest that ‘we should be kinder than necessary’. While I appreciate the idea that kindness is important, two things about this statement challenge me.

The first is the use of the word ‘should’. Personally, I’ve gone to great lengths to eliminate this word from my vocabulary, because it is a ‘shaming’ word, meant to enforce one person’s opinion on another.

I wonder if you react the same way that I do when ‘should’ is used. I am immediately suspicious of the motivation of the one using it. Why do they think I ‘should’?

The second concern I have about this statement is the word ‘necessary’. I have a difficult time reconciling the use of the words kindness and necessary in the same sentence. The implication being that there is some sort of requirement or obligation involved with kindness. That isn’t how I conceive of kindness.

I went looking for references to kindness and found one that seemed to mesh with my understanding. It suggested that it is any selfless act of caring or compassion and can easily be recognized in both our own or others large and small actions.

I wondered how often kindness flows to me and through me. I paused for a few minutes to see what would come.

If you sat back right now for a moment or two, what do you think would come to you?

Two events jumped to the head of the line for me. In each instance they were infused with joy, not only for the receiver, but also for the giver. And it seemed to me that joy was the real source for the acts of kindness. I recognized a deliberateness to the actions, a meaningful opening to spirit and a flowing from abundance, as if kindness was an endless source.

I’d like to share mine with you in the hopes that you see some of your own and let them wrap you up in a feeling of joy.

The first one happened a few weeks ago while I was at a workshop at Kripalu Retreat Center in Lenox, Massachusetts. After classes were over for the day our group decided to get together in the evening for a kind of impromptu ‘talent show’. One of my friends, whom I’d met six years earlier at the same workshop, stood up and mesmerized the group with her divine performance poetry reading. We sat spellbound. I could not believe the incredible growth in my friend and went over to her; hugged her and told her I was so proud of her. Some might view this as an act of kindness, but she and I knew it was more than that because it came from a deep well of joy we share.

A few days later I received an email from her with an attached video of her reading a poem she wrote just for me. I was touched to my very core and a kindness born of joy was returned to me.

The second event happened a few days ago, while my wife and I were on a day trip together. We stopped at a restaurant my parents loved to visit and sat down at an empty table. Our waitress came over and engaged us in a conversation and asked if she could get us something to drink. When she returned, she inquired if we were ready to order. She took my wife’s order and turned to me. I said I’d like to start with a piece of their coconut cream pie (knowing that they sometimes run out of it). She told me she liked the way I ordered the best first and from there we had an extremely pleasant exchange throughout the meal.

After our meal was over and she came to our table with our bill, I told her that I was awarding her my ‘best waitstaff of the year award’. She absolutely beamed with pleasure and told me I’d made her whole day…maybe her whole week, as she went to help the next customer.

I took the paper ring that encircled my napkin and silverware and made it into a small award certificate for her and gave her a tip that matched our bill total. I handed everything to her, and my wife and I started walking out. She ran after us and called out to me, that she was going to keep the certificate forever and that I’d made her whole year!

There was such joy in her voice, and I knew that my simple act of kindness came from joy and reached out to create more joy.

Each of these things are important to me because they represent a connection to our divine source, where joy and love exist in abundance.

Posted on

Making Someone’s Day

Do you remember the last time someone ‘made your day’ and how you felt inside?

Can you remember a time you made someone else’s day? Was it something you said, perhaps some kind words. Or maybe it was something you did, like an unexpected, good deed.

Did it happen naturally, without any forethought or was it a conscious choice you made and planned?

Did any part of you wonder what you might get in return or was it an altruistic act, kindness for the sake of kindness?

One of the interesting things about either, making someone else’s day or someone making your day, is how deep the love feels. I’ve often experienced feeling intensely touched by the actions of others. Their actions don’t even need to be directed toward me. Just witnessing love in action is wonderful, no matter where it’s found.

This past Sunday, while driving on our way home from the local food co-op, my wife and I were approaching a traffic light and it turned red, giving me a chance to make a roadside donation. That’s my phrase for offering some money to someone by the side of the road. In this case, it was a couple. I handed the folded twenty I keep in my car door for this purpose, to the young woman standing closest to our car. She reached for the money and offered me a grateful smile and their thanks in return. The traffic light remained red for a long time, which gave her the opportunity to explain that she and her husband were on their way back home to Louisiana and this would be very helpful.

I know some folks think giving money to ‘pan-handlers’ (the term most often applied to someone asking for money by the side of the road), isn’t a very good idea. I respect their point of view, and yet have come to a different conclusion and from my experience it’s a sure way to ‘make someone’s day’, no matter what they use the money for. I have offered myself a lot of practice in fully releasing any strings I might have wanted to attach to the money and so, both the giver and receiver in this exchange can share in making each other’s day.

Awhile back, a friend of mine told me she reads a book I’ve wrote (Little Buddha Book One) every night before she goes to bed. She told me it makes her happy, calms her from her day and allows her to drift off to sleep smiling. These kind words not only made my day, but they brought tears to my eyes. As a writer, unless someone tells you, you never know if your writings mean anything to anyone, so it was a very precious gift to me.

Knowing how good making someone’s day feels, I wonder why I don’t do it more often. I need an answer to this question.

What could it be? Is life so filled with ‘necessary things’ that I don’t have any time left over?

I immediately poked a hole in this theory. The two exchanges I’ve mentioned in this post account for perhaps four minutes in total, which easily tells me I DO have the time.

So, what’s the real reason?

I think it’s pretty simple actually. It’s a lack of focus on my part, an absence of attention to things that could matter greatly to me in my life and to others I come into contact with. I don’t say this to criticize myself (or you by proxy, as a reader). I say this to myself to heighten my awareness of what is, or can be, important and deeply meaningful to me in my life.

Sometimes all it takes is a moment of recognition that making someone’s day is a pathway for love to enter the world. A simple, direct, heart touching way and it’s free for anyone who wants it.

What a blessing.