Category: release

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Time to Reconsider

I have many teachers in my life, some exist in proximity to me, others are farther away. Each of them reminds me of things I want to learn to release or to be at peace with. They are predominantly things that irritate, annoy or upset me.

I guess by now I ought to be used to this, but I’m not.

If I am not careful, I get sucked into their orbit and react in kind. This does not serve me.

To be at peace, I know I need to release any attachment to my version of what is ‘right’. I wonder to myself, how is this done?

At first glance, I’m tempted to accept and embrace what my culture has taught me, which is that I deserve to feel the way I do, about anything. If I can find someone who shares my feelings or who otherwise supports my right to feel the way I do, I have no incentive to make any changes, despite the amount of conflict and internal suffering I experience.

Feeling justified is an end unto itself and it halts all other thoughts and holds me in place.

The other thing it does is it creates a host of troublesome feelings inside me and ultimately keeps me from any sense of peace or freedom.

It’s too high a price to pay.

My feelings create a crack in the doorway, a place where some light comes in. And when the light hits my feelings, I sense there is the possibility for change.

Perhaps my view of the world is wrong. Perhaps there’s another way to view my situation that would be better for me. Perhaps I don’t have to stay in the rut created by constant reinforcement.

This feels like good news to me. I try to open my eyes and heart further. What change could I make that would allow my life to be more peaceful, contented, even joyful?

The first thing that occurs to me is that I could remind myself that there are numerous ways to live in this world. This translates as, my way may not be the best or only way and others’ views might make more sense.

It takes some inner strength to say this out loud to myself. For whatever reason, it’s challenging for me to think I have it wrong, but what a wonderful opportunity it is for me to entertain this idea.

This whole concept is one of suspended belief and judgement. A sort of time out or pause, so that I can reconsider what I believe.

It’s a mind opening invitation I can give myself.

If I sit back and think about any given situation from a neutral position, maybe I’ll see a bigger picture, one that may offer me a wider view and provide space to see if what I believe still rings true.

It feels like a wise choice to make and I’m going to give it a try.

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What If Today…

I want to share something that I wrote for a dear friend of mine recently. It was intended to provide a spark to ignite a different way of viewing life. It was something that I needed. As with all of my posts, the thoughts and words arrive for me and then moved outward into the world.

The post is a dream in a way. Of a richer life. And of course, as it is in all cases, it depends on what we choose. I wonder to myself what will I choose, I wonder too, what will you choose?

What if today…

What if today…I choose to believe…to truly accept and embrace…that every single thing that happens to me is here to benefit me. What if I choose to see beyond appearances and all of the things that blind me. What if I give myself permission to believe that I am loved and cared for and know that everything I experience in my life is there to offer me something of value. That no matter what the world tells me, I can choose my own path. What if I embrace that my heart and spirit are the ones that set me free.

What if today I release any need to control the uncontrollable. What if I spruce up my ability to yield and let go of all the things that weigh me down…to set them aside and feel the precious liberation and the expansive freedom that choice creates.

What if today I collect all the most lovable parts of me and hug them and ask them to spread their joy throughout my body…my life.

What if today I allow every sorrow, pain, challenge, and concern to take the day off…to rest…what if I placed them all gently in the ocean of bliss that is my true home, where they can be washed clean.

What if, for one day, I give up needing to be in charge of anything and allow life to flow gently through me.

What if today…I breathe in peace and breathe out love.

What if today…is that day.

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Tipping Point

Are you on your right path?

It’s a really important question and one I’ve been asking myself, especially recently.

I just returned from six weeks of vacation and have been struck by how wonderful it felt to have so few obligations or commitments.

It made me quite sensitive to my inner feelings and I discovered a strong desire to reevaluate my choices.

I sensed a depth to these feelings that surprised me, and I noticed a need to change some of my actions. I felt I could no longer continue doing things because it was my pattern of behavior. Rather, I needed to feel that what I chose to do was a part of my right path.

In many ways this felt intimidating to me, and I felt shaken out of my normal routines.

Have you ever experienced this? Have you experienced that out of seemingly nowhere you’re guided to reconsider your thoughts and actions?

I felt a strong realignment surging through me, but initially I did not understand what it meant or how it would change me.

I had to release my ‘need’ to understand and just sit with my feeling until I arrived at a point of knowing.

This is a very uncomfortable thing to do and very disorienting.

However, I find life shifts like this to be accompanied by bright light around the edges, offering hope in the distance.

A picture did finally appear and a fuller understanding of what all of this means. If you are experiencing this, or you have in the past, or if you do in the future, please consider being open to sitting with your feelings until the light appears. I believe it arrives to expand our lives or to clarify them in beautiful ways.

For me, I realized the sense of oppression I placed upon myself by requiring certain actions in my life. I’ve always lived with the habit of having to expand and broaden myself. This is not a ‘bad’ thing unless it reaches a tipping point. That’s the fine line between where an action, thought, dream, desire, or practice shifts from sunshine to darkness.

Perhaps you’ve experienced where there is a shift that occurs between owning a thing to being owned by a thing. For instance, you think you are enjoying living in your house then everything seems to go wrong all at once and you find yourself feeling owned by your home.

It’s not just homes that have this power. Everything does, depending on your outlook and choices.

I discovered that I made a number of decisions which have created tipping points. One of these is demanding and requiring myself to write two posts EVERY week. What began as a joyful expression shifted into writing constantly under a deadline, sapping some of the joy from the experience.

Please understand this has not impacted my desire to be of service by sharing what feels important to me to pass along.

What it has done is to make me consciously aware that I need to write when I am inspired, rather than according to a strictly keep schedule.

Realizing this has opened an important part of me and has offered a sense of peace and freedom.  I realize that adhering to my designed schedule is a source of discomfort that I’ve been feeling and has resulted in a hesitancy to make any changes in my life pattern, even though it’s the right move for me.

So, what does all of this mean?

It means I choose to continue writing posts because I love to be able to express my feelings and thoughts, but…I’ll be writing them when I feel inspired, rather than according to my originally scheduled twice a week pattern. They will come when their time is right.

I hope you will stay tuned and continue reading them as they appear.

I hope even more that you make decisions in your life which are true for you and keep you on your right path.

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Ideals

I like to explore.

Sometimes it’s a road I’ve never been on before. Other times it’s a new recipe that sounds good to me. That one will be hard to believe for those who know how limited my culinary tendencies are.

Recently I decided to explore a new idea and listened to a podcast by Sahara Rose, which featured Isis Indriya as a guest. Their conversation focused on Kemet, otherwise known to most of us as Egypt.

I have to confess that I have very little awareness or understanding about this culture, its traditions or history and didn’t feel especially drawn to it. That is, until listening to Sahara and Isis talk about it with such reverence, curiosity, and devotion.

Part of exploring to me is releasing myself from my preconceived notions and opening my inner world and absorbing the essence of what others share with me. It is often deliciously fulfilling, broadens my beliefs, and provides me with more to savor.

This was certainly the case listening to them.

Another part of exploring is learning to appreciate what other people and cultures have to offer, so I was particularly interested when Isis began explaining about a set of principles she uses to guide her life.

I am always interested in what other folks choose to orient their lives around, especially since many of us are prone to viewing our lives through narrow lenses or how we fair in comparison with social media.

Breaking away from this can be a wonderful shift and I’d like to tell you about one of the principles Isis shared. It’s called the 42 Ideals of Maat, who is a Kemetic goddess.

Don’t be scared away yet. I’m not trying to convert anyone, just opening a window that you may find expands your world in directions that serve you. I believe we can learn from every culture if we allow our minds to be open.

Isis shared a few of the Ideals, which intrigued me to look further because I liked them so much. They are a set of ideas that could assist anyone who desires to lead a truthful, just, harmonious, balanced life, which is something I want to do.

I’ll share the list with you, and you can see if any or all of them inspire you or draw you in.

I honor virtue, I benefit with gratitude, I am peaceful, I respect the property of others, I live in truth, I regard all altars with respect, I am sincere, I consume only my fair share, I have only good intentions, I relate in peace, I honor all creatures with reverence, I can be trusted, I care for the earth, I keep my own council, I speak positively of others, I am balanced in my emotions, I am honest in my relationships, I aspire to higher consciousness, I spread joy, I do the best I can, I create harmony, I invoke laughter, I am open to love in various forms, I am forgiving, I am kind, I am respectful of others, I release all judgement, I follow my inner guidance, I converse with awareness, I do good, I give blessings, I keep the waters pure, I am optimistic, I am humble, I achieve with integrity, I advance through my own ability and I embrace the All.

Admittedly that is quite the list and I find it difficult to accept that I would ever be able to live according to all of them, but that doesn’t change my outlook about embracing their value to me and consequently to the world.

I am strongly drawn to several of them, and I suspect if you spent a moment or two rereading the list there would be some you’d like as well.

As with everything I explore, there are aspects that I want to become an integral part of me. As I study the list, I find myself sensing the value of being a channel for good to enter the world through these ideals. It is my belief that heaven is a place of pure love and when I am aware of my direct connection with it, there is an opening within me. Through this opening all things flow and become ‘real’ in this world, encouraging attraction and even more love to be felt.

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Holding and Releasing

I’ve been thinking about what it means to hold onto things and the value there can be in releasing them.

Here’s a simple, quick test for you.

Stand up and pick up something in each hand, like a book or other small object, then raise both of your arms, stretching them away from your body at shoulder height. Okay, now hold this position for as long as you can. You can also modify this if you can’t stand up at the moment. Simply hold the objects as if you were standing.

It’s incredible to me how fatiguing this exercise can be, despite the limited amount of weight you’re holding. Of course, the fact is, you’re also holding up the weight of each of your arms. After a little research, I discovered a 190-pound persons arms weight about 10 pounds each, which adds to the difficulty of sustained holding.

Why does any of this matter unless you are a body builder and need to increase your strength? Well, for me, it’s because the physical challenge of this exercise has emotional, intellectual, and spiritual ramifications.

How, you ask?

Imagine that instead of physical weights, you substitute something else. Here’s a few examples I’d offer, but if something more personally relevant strikes you, please use it in place of what I’ve provided.

Imagine someone in your life just said something mean to you, or you remember a time a year ago, ten years ago or from your childhood where you felt ignored, abused, or devalued.

If it was easy to conjure up this image, it’s clearly something you’re still holding on to. Something that has weight and the longer you hold it, the heavier it gets. You may think you’ve let it go, but if you still remember it, you probably haven’t.

And what about a time when you couldn’t get something done because it was too hard. You didn’t understand it or didn’t have enough time or a good enough teacher to help you. And because of this, you failed. How heavy is the feeling of failure to you?

Can you visualize a time when your spirit suffered because you felt too weak or too small? Perhaps someone else convinced you that you were not spiritually worthy, not lovable, not valuable. I suspect the weight of this cannot be measured.

So, what is the antidote?

From the title of this post, you may realize that, in my view, it is the act of releasing, of letting go of the weight, setting it down or setting it aside, that is the antidote.

Easier said than done, you might be thinking. Or you may be entertaining the question, how is it possible to release what you are still holding?

As with all things, I believe it begins by making a conscious choice, recognizing that you have the power to choose the direction of your life. The decisions and actions of others are their ‘business’, not yours, and you needn’t have any investment in them.

Because you have ‘free will’, you are in charge of what to keep and what to release, no matter what others tell you. And you are the one to decide if you take anything personally that others say to you. You have the freedom to choose, and you can exercise this freedom in every moment of your life.

Some things that we have absorbed over the years have taken root in us, but we can make a practice of releasing them. Each and every time they surface, we can acknowledge them and the weight they place on us and bid them farewell, knowing they are no longer necessary in our lives. We’ve experienced them enough and can let them go.

This may only take one time, but it may also have to be repeated, before we are free from them.

I wish you well with your practice.

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Release

What are you holding on to that weighs you down or causes you pain and suffering?

What would your life be like if you let them go?

I have a pretty long list as it turns out. It sparks me to wonder why I hold so tightly to ideas and opinions that clearly no longer serve me, if they ever did.

How about you, can you say the same thing? Can you feel how wonderful it would be to loosen your grip and release things that clutter your life?

Perhaps right now you might want to take a moment and join me by creating a list of thoughts and observations. And once created, explore the idea of letting them go.

Here are some of mine to help you get started. If something ignites your own awareness, please feel free to follow it and see where it leads you. Remember there are never any ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ answers.

I believe I would be well served by releasing the following:

** my need to be, feel or think that I am ‘right’ (about anything).

** my idea that I need to be ready to say the next thing when I am in a dialogue with someone (rather than just being present with them).

** the idea I have about all of my past ‘mistakes’ (especially since I cannot possibly know what was or wasn’t a mistake).

** the inner need I feel about ‘my’ team having to win in order for me to be happy.

** anything that I am holding inside my body which causes pain, suffering or discomfort (because I cannot feel safe, whole, or complete without letting go).

** any need I have to make comparisons (which hurt all parties).

** any value judgements I make (because they lock in the notion that I am ‘right’ and that others are ‘wrong’ and I don’t/can’t see far enough or wide enough to know the truth).

** the inner desire I feel for more food than my body needs (which can feel like a competition and one that profoundly impacts me).

** any restriction I place on experiencing JOY (there are times I feel I have to ‘earn’ joy, rather than knowing it is a part of my spiritual essence, always yearning to be freely felt).

I’m sure I could go on, but I bet you get the idea.

Now for the hard part…how do I make this happen? How do I effectively release all these things I seem to realize are not helpful for me?

It strikes me I’m not starting in the most beneficial place, because I used the phrase, “now for the hard part”. Maybe you were quick and picked right up on this. To begin any process with the thought that it will be difficult or challenging or ‘hard’, prejudices you and sets the stage for self-fulfilling prophecies to come true.

So, now for the easy part. I know it might sound simple, but I believe it is also quite true. YOU CHOOSE. If it’s obvious to you that your thoughts are complicating your life in any way, you simple choose new thoughts. You replace the ones that restrict you or run contrary to what serves you (makes you happy, fulfilled or joyful).

As soon as you recognize the appearance of conflicts or judgements entering your life, you make a conscious choice to release them, knowing it is you who profits from this. You place your sense of self-worth above what you imagine others expect or demand of you.

And, you keep doing this, decision after decision after decision. The constancy of choosing to release that which does not serve you, will create new patterns in your life, ones that do serve you.

Choosing is always up to you. I hope you choose well.

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Leave It, Or Not

I doubt a day goes by that we don’t experience some statement or command given us by someone in our lives.

Seriously, can you think of one day where you got the chance to do exactly what you wanted, and no one suggested or told you to do something else?

I think it would be pretty rare for this to happen.

And if this is true for humans, imagine how much truer it is for animals.

Have you ever watched one of the shows on TV where they spend time training a rescue dog, getting it ready to become a member of a new family? Well, if so, you’ve probably heard there are seven basic commands; sit, down, stay, come, heel, off and no.

According to some trainers there are a lot more and in one case I saw twenty-one commands noted. Wow, tough to be a dog.

One of my favorites is, “leave it”. It’s mostly used on walks to keep the dog’s attention focused on moving forward and not becoming distracted. This can be especially difficult with young dogs or those with active imaginations (curiosity), the ones who are all over the place.

My childhood dog was like this. We’d go for a walk which I thought might take thirty minutes, only to spend twice that amount of time snooping around the neighborhood. I wished I’d known the command, “leave it” back then.

Recently I watched several dogs and their humans walking by our house and noticed that some of them moved in a straight line, while others wove back and forth, with the dogs clearly in charge.

It made me wonder about how the humans acted when they were by themselves. Did they wander about or make beelines directly where they were going?

I’m not suggesting there is any right or wrong pathway to travel, merely observing the choices they were making, and it got me to wondering about what decisions I make.

Am I often distracted and easily put off my path? Could I benefit from saying to myself, “leave it”, putting a little oomph in the verbal command?

I know that it can be challenging to try to set things aside and focus on the main mission. I also know that I learn a lot by wandering aimlessly as long as I keep my eyes open.

If you thought about it, when would you tell yourself to “leave it”?

Are there certain things that you know don’t benefit you, but you do them anyway? If so, do you have any idea why? I often don’t unless I take a moment to consider them.

As you’ve noticed by now, I ask a lot of questions. I find it’s one of the most effective ways to grow. The questions challenge me to rethink some of my decisions and force me to reconsider some of my actions.

Using the idea of “leave it”, provides me an opportunity to consider things in my life which may not be good for me, like another piece of blueberry pie, or watching a violent TV show before bedtime or criticizing someone’s actions without understanding anything about them or the situation they’re in.

Given a little time, I am able to create quite a list of things to consider “leaving” and maybe you can too.

I think I’ll keep this command in mind for a while and see what happens and where it takes me.

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Not Falling

When is the last time you fell? Was it more like a stumble and you caught yourself or did you go down spread-eagle and land flat out?

I’ve fallen several times over the years. The most recent time was down the stairs. Well, I should say, down the last stair. It easily could have been avoided. You see, I was carrying something in my arms and couldn’t see the bottom step. I thought I was at the landing, but no, I still had one more step to go. I lost my balance, dropped what I was carrying and couldn’t recover quickly enough to catch the railing. So…down I went. Of course, I fell on top of what I’d been carrying, to add insult to my injuries.

My fall also created a commotion because my family was concerned and came to discover me at the bottom of the stairs, splayed out and more than a little upset.

Worse still, there were many suggestions about how my fall could have been averted. Yes, I knew that already.

Later when I was calm and reliving my adventure, I realized that had I not been carrying anything or had I arranged what I was carrying so that I could see forward and downward, I would not have fallen. As we used to say when I was a kid, DUH!

So why had I carried this armful of stuff and risked a potential fall?

The best I could come up with was, ‘I didn’t even think about it, I just did it. I picked up the stuff and started down the stairs, assuming all would be well.’

Here’s the thing. Had I arrived safely I would not have had to consider my actions, but because I’d fallen, I needed to see if there was a teaching in my experience.

I strongly believe there is a teaching in every single action in our lives. We are so often blissfully unaware of this, but if we took a moment, we might see there could be truth in it.

Case in point.

I sat back and considered, could it be that the same thing happens to me emotionally? Am I carrying too much with me, making it hard to see where I’m going?

If I am excessively thinking about or stressing over something in my life and allowing it to overwhelm me emotionally, is it possible that it results in my falling?

My answer is an unequivocable ‘yes’.

Is it possible we all do this?

I can certainly see how I can lose my balance and become unsteady when I am worried, angry, overtired, jealous, distracted or any other emotional state.

Some of these are very heavy loads.

Might it not be a wonderful idea to release some or most of what I carry with me, especially those things that block my view? To let go of or set down objects or thoughts or habits which take up so much space?

The world offers us an overabundance of concerns. How many can we carry without losing our balance and falling?

It’s a difficult question to answer.

I also know it’s an important one for me. Perhaps it is for you as well.

I think I would be wise to consider releasing anything that feels too heavy, knowing it could cause me to fall. Here’s just one example.

There are those in my world who believe I should stay informed. I should read the paper, follow a news feed on my phone or watch the evening news, so that I stay abreast of world events. They don’t seem to understand the cost of this to me. I feel deeply for what others are going through and it weighs on me, heavily. It overwhelms me and pushes me out of balance emotionally and spiritually. And the truth is, there is little, if anything I can do to remedy the world’s situations.

I must choose what to carry with me and what to set aside. If I want to live a beautiful life, I benefit from paying attention to what I am carrying and whether it allows me to stay balanced.