Tag: truth

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Good or Bad

I am wondering something.

Let’s say that instead of deciding right away, what if we choose to exercise an automatic time delay before we labeled anything as good or bad?

What do you think would happen?

I have a suspicion that I would profit from this experiment. Rather than applying a quick label I might see that it takes time to know for sure.

Even then, I might not be correct.

Do you have any interest in giving this a try?

Suppose you wrote down the situation and your immediate response and set it aside, promising to come back to it “later”.

And suppose, just for one time, you watched what happened, like an observer without an opinion. You simply stood off to the side and waited…for a day, a week, a month, a year. And when the time period was up, you reevaluated.

I’ve tried this from time to time and it always astonishes me. Almost every time I learn something profound. Almost every time I recognize how far from the truth my first response was and how much more I have to learn.

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Complaining Or Not

This is what I was thinking recently.

I need to release my complaints in a different way. I feel justified about expressing them, which ultimately hurts me, because the way I live and express my life either supports and enhances my life OR it creates suffering for me.

I recognize it is my choice.

I am in charge of my attitude and reactions, not a victim or a bystander.

If I truly wish to live a joy-filled life, which is what I say I want, I have to ask myself, how is this going to happen if I fill my time by finding constant fault with the world?

If I looked at my life as having limited time, say 85 years, why would I want to spend any of that time needlessly suffering by choosing to find fault with it?

Every moment I spend complaining is a moment of suffering, and it is something I am doing to myself.

It would be such a wise decision to shift my perspective based on what I really want.

What I really want is to create and experience the maximum amount of joy during my life. This means releasing my need to complain and find, discover, and reveal things that enhance my sense of wonder, curiosity, peace, and joy.

The constant choice is up to me.

Today I’m going to let go of all things that cause me suffering and embrace those which create and enhance my joy.

Today I’m going to be my own best friend.

I invite you to join me, if it feels right to you.

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Time to Reconsider

I have many teachers in my life, some exist in proximity to me, others are farther away. Each of them reminds me of things I want to learn to release or to be at peace with. They are predominantly things that irritate, annoy or upset me.

I guess by now I ought to be used to this, but I’m not.

If I am not careful, I get sucked into their orbit and react in kind. This does not serve me.

To be at peace, I know I need to release any attachment to my version of what is ‘right’. I wonder to myself, how is this done?

At first glance, I’m tempted to accept and embrace what my culture has taught me, which is that I deserve to feel the way I do, about anything. If I can find someone who shares my feelings or who otherwise supports my right to feel the way I do, I have no incentive to make any changes, despite the amount of conflict and internal suffering I experience.

Feeling justified is an end unto itself and it halts all other thoughts and holds me in place.

The other thing it does is it creates a host of troublesome feelings inside me and ultimately keeps me from any sense of peace or freedom.

It’s too high a price to pay.

My feelings create a crack in the doorway, a place where some light comes in. And when the light hits my feelings, I sense there is the possibility for change.

Perhaps my view of the world is wrong. Perhaps there’s another way to view my situation that would be better for me. Perhaps I don’t have to stay in the rut created by constant reinforcement.

This feels like good news to me. I try to open my eyes and heart further. What change could I make that would allow my life to be more peaceful, contented, even joyful?

The first thing that occurs to me is that I could remind myself that there are numerous ways to live in this world. This translates as, my way may not be the best or only way and others’ views might make more sense.

It takes some inner strength to say this out loud to myself. For whatever reason, it’s challenging for me to think I have it wrong, but what a wonderful opportunity it is for me to entertain this idea.

This whole concept is one of suspended belief and judgement. A sort of time out or pause, so that I can reconsider what I believe.

It’s a mind opening invitation I can give myself.

If I sit back and think about any given situation from a neutral position, maybe I’ll see a bigger picture, one that may offer me a wider view and provide space to see if what I believe still rings true.

It feels like a wise choice to make and I’m going to give it a try.

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What If Today…

I want to share something that I wrote for a dear friend of mine recently. It was intended to provide a spark to ignite a different way of viewing life. It was something that I needed. As with all of my posts, the thoughts and words arrive for me and then moved outward into the world.

The post is a dream in a way. Of a richer life. And of course, as it is in all cases, it depends on what we choose. I wonder to myself what will I choose, I wonder too, what will you choose?

What if today…

What if today…I choose to believe…to truly accept and embrace…that every single thing that happens to me is here to benefit me. What if I choose to see beyond appearances and all of the things that blind me. What if I give myself permission to believe that I am loved and cared for and know that everything I experience in my life is there to offer me something of value. That no matter what the world tells me, I can choose my own path. What if I embrace that my heart and spirit are the ones that set me free.

What if today I release any need to control the uncontrollable. What if I spruce up my ability to yield and let go of all the things that weigh me down…to set them aside and feel the precious liberation and the expansive freedom that choice creates.

What if today I collect all the most lovable parts of me and hug them and ask them to spread their joy throughout my body…my life.

What if today I allow every sorrow, pain, challenge, and concern to take the day off…to rest…what if I placed them all gently in the ocean of bliss that is my true home, where they can be washed clean.

What if, for one day, I give up needing to be in charge of anything and allow life to flow gently through me.

What if today…I breathe in peace and breathe out love.

What if today…is that day.

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A More Harmonious Way

I have a strong sense there is another way for me to live in this world, a more harmonious way.

I see more clearly now that I have been living from a sense of emptiness, led by an inner desire to fill myself up, to make myself whole.

I have accepted teachings that fostered this view, that preached lack and limit and that I am not enough…ever…and that I need what others have in order to be happy.

No amount of things others possess will make me whole.

When I live according to emptiness, with a need and desire to fill myself up, I have already chosen the long path.

When I see…feel…and know that I am already full…that every thing of value is already inside of me…it is then that my fullness becomes a sacred emptiness.

When I sit, without need for what others have, knowing they can not give me anything I don’t already possess…when I am in this place…I reveal my oneness, my connection to the divine, my fullness.

This is where joy lives.

I open to seeing that joy lives in all things when it lives in me first.

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I Know Who I Am

I want to share this with you. It’s sort of a poetic approach to releasing strong feelings that kept circling inside of me. I am grateful that I accepted this style of outlet and invite you to come along on a part of my journey. It may even stimulate you to walk a different path of your own.

This is called…I Know Who I Am…

I admit it…I feel some rage inside of me

From an early age…I knew I was not a number…or a letter…no matter what society…or schools said

And I refuse to be defined…in this way

Defined by a social security number or bank account balance

Or my GPA or retirement fund or my house’s worth

The part of me that has value…is far beyond any number or letter

Beyond my car’s trade in amount or my weight or my pledge at church

I am more than my…driver’s license number or the calories I eat or the number of friends I have…or any number or letter that attempts to limit me or contain me or define me

Ever since my beginning…others have chosen to judge me or control me or place me in a box…to identify me

I didn’t know any better…so I let them

I abided by their rules…submitted to their concepts…lived according to their choices

That’s where all of my rage comes from…from a deep place where conformity is required

Where the grades were assigned to me…limiting my growth and expansion

I’ve always carried an inner knowing that these attempts would ultimately fail

That I would break free…somehow…some way…some day

Because I am not only…earth’s child…I am heaven’s child too

Inside of me there exists…limitless possibilities…endless potential…and dreams wanting to be experienced

It’s up to me what I choose to believe…no one else gets a say…even if they think they do

I am a part of the divine…endowed with treasure…born into this world…open for exploration

I am not limited by other’s choices

I am not their number

I am my own heart and spirit

Looking inside…I find a place of peace…where rage’s fire is quenched

I can give back what others have placed upon me

They can keep it if they want it…but I can have my own peace

I can embrace…the truth of who I am…for I am a drop of the ocean of bliss that is heaven

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Tipping Point

Are you on your right path?

It’s a really important question and one I’ve been asking myself, especially recently.

I just returned from six weeks of vacation and have been struck by how wonderful it felt to have so few obligations or commitments.

It made me quite sensitive to my inner feelings and I discovered a strong desire to reevaluate my choices.

I sensed a depth to these feelings that surprised me, and I noticed a need to change some of my actions. I felt I could no longer continue doing things because it was my pattern of behavior. Rather, I needed to feel that what I chose to do was a part of my right path.

In many ways this felt intimidating to me, and I felt shaken out of my normal routines.

Have you ever experienced this? Have you experienced that out of seemingly nowhere you’re guided to reconsider your thoughts and actions?

I felt a strong realignment surging through me, but initially I did not understand what it meant or how it would change me.

I had to release my ‘need’ to understand and just sit with my feeling until I arrived at a point of knowing.

This is a very uncomfortable thing to do and very disorienting.

However, I find life shifts like this to be accompanied by bright light around the edges, offering hope in the distance.

A picture did finally appear and a fuller understanding of what all of this means. If you are experiencing this, or you have in the past, or if you do in the future, please consider being open to sitting with your feelings until the light appears. I believe it arrives to expand our lives or to clarify them in beautiful ways.

For me, I realized the sense of oppression I placed upon myself by requiring certain actions in my life. I’ve always lived with the habit of having to expand and broaden myself. This is not a ‘bad’ thing unless it reaches a tipping point. That’s the fine line between where an action, thought, dream, desire, or practice shifts from sunshine to darkness.

Perhaps you’ve experienced where there is a shift that occurs between owning a thing to being owned by a thing. For instance, you think you are enjoying living in your house then everything seems to go wrong all at once and you find yourself feeling owned by your home.

It’s not just homes that have this power. Everything does, depending on your outlook and choices.

I discovered that I made a number of decisions which have created tipping points. One of these is demanding and requiring myself to write two posts EVERY week. What began as a joyful expression shifted into writing constantly under a deadline, sapping some of the joy from the experience.

Please understand this has not impacted my desire to be of service by sharing what feels important to me to pass along.

What it has done is to make me consciously aware that I need to write when I am inspired, rather than according to a strictly keep schedule.

Realizing this has opened an important part of me and has offered a sense of peace and freedom.  I realize that adhering to my designed schedule is a source of discomfort that I’ve been feeling and has resulted in a hesitancy to make any changes in my life pattern, even though it’s the right move for me.

So, what does all of this mean?

It means I choose to continue writing posts because I love to be able to express my feelings and thoughts, but…I’ll be writing them when I feel inspired, rather than according to my originally scheduled twice a week pattern. They will come when their time is right.

I hope you will stay tuned and continue reading them as they appear.

I hope even more that you make decisions in your life which are true for you and keep you on your right path.

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Staying In Your Own Lane

While away on a break from writing original posts I thought I’d share some of my favorites with you from the past three and a half years. In mid-March I’ll return with more original posts. Until then, please enjoy these.

It’s interesting to me how various phrases come into our working vocabulary. One I’ve recently heard is the phrase, ‘stay in your own lane’, by which the person generally means, mind your own business, and stop interfering in mine.

There can be especially troublesome moments, at work and in other settings, when someone who has an insufficient knowledge or ability to handle things, attempts to interject themselves in tasks that are not assigned to them. Although it’s difficult to redirect these folks, it’s often necessary in order to inform them that you have things covered and it’s your job, not theirs.

Overstepping is particularly challenging when the person refuses to stop, either by their intentional or unintentional actions and it may require supervisory intervention.

Why all this focus on ‘staying in your own lane’?

The answer is, because I’ve been having conversations with Lia, an ethereal feminine voice of god who has been offering me wisdom and guidance about this very subject, but from an entirely different direction.

How so, you may ask?

It all started with a conversation about the challenges I felt about being able to stay connected to the divine. What I want most in my life is to feel a direct, unwavering, deep connection with the divine, so that the whole of my life revolves around it.

What I discover on a daily basis is that there are numerous distractions that push or force or entice me away from this straight line. There are so many of them that I easily get caught up in them and lose my focus. Although I tell myself that they are worth my attention, what really happens is that they sap my strength and dissipate my power, which makes it difficult and near impossible to maintain my true aim, union with the divine.

I cannot stay in my own desired lane.

No outside force is doing this to me. They may try, but because I have free will, whatever happens is either because I allow it, or I choose it.

Of course, I turned to Lia and asked for her guidance. Here is what she told me.

“Until you practice ‘staying in your own lane’ (in my case, paying attention to my most important aim of deeply connecting with the divine), you think it is not possible, but as you practice, you see that it is possible. When a distraction arrives (anything I initially perceive as not heading me toward the divine), the first and most essential step is to take notice of its arrival. Spend a moment truly seeing it for what it is, an opportunity to teach you something valuable. Allow it to offer you its insight, thank it, then move back into your lane.”

I wondered if there was more. There was.

Lia continued, “Distractions are not permanent, but rather temporary events, guideposts to help redirect you with a greater awareness, and improve your focus.”

That made sense to me, especially if after some practice, it became a relatively quick process for me. If I could make the choice to acknowledge them, see their value and release them, I would easily be able to return to my straight path and then stay in my lane.

I expressed a deep sense of gratitude to Lia for sharing these valuable insights with me and I hope they are of worth to you as well.

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Closets

While away on a break from writing original posts I thought I’d share some of my favorites with you from the past three and a half years. In mid-March I’ll return with more original posts. Until then, please enjoy these.

I believe this is the first post that I have written that forced itself out of me. The topic kept coming back and despite the fact that I resisted it, it would not be denied.

Why? What was I trying to avoid? I wasn’t sure but I knew I had to explore it.

Have there been times in your life when you knew something important was about to happen, but there was an element of concern in your mind? Maybe I ought to be clearer, I don’t mean ‘concern’, but straight up ‘fear’.

That’s the sense I had when the topic, ‘closets’, came into view.

The first thought I had was simple enough. After all we have lots of closets in our house, most of them pretty full. Some have clothes, shoes, boot, jackets, hats, and other articles of clothing. Others have towels, sheets, our vacuum, extra Kleenex and toilet paper, and a host of miscellaneous things.

Okay, no big deal there.

I did notice that closets are places to hide things you don’t want to see out in the open, because they would be too messy or take up too much space you need for other things.

This observation seemed to offer a clue, but the picture still wasn’t clear.

I remembered a saying about closets, that they are a place to store your skeletons. I checked out Wikipedia and discovered the saying came from 19th century England and was an idiom used to describe an undisclosed fact about someone which, if revealed, would damage perceptions of the person.

So, now I’m getting closer. Closets are an important hiding place for what you don’t want others to know about you. They house secrets and hide what we might describe as shameful things. I wondered; don’t we all have things we hope never see the light of day? Things we’ve thought or done that if others knew, would alter their opinions of us?

That’s closer to my fear about not wanting to write this post, but not the end point yet.

It only took a second longer to realize that closets have a much more significant reference point…’coming out of the closet’, where an individual reveals their sexuality, rather than hiding it. For those brave people who take this extraordinary step in their lives, I want to say, bravo to you.

Allowing others in society to dictate who a person can or cannot be through the use of shame, denial, stigma, humiliation, or any other form of control, devalues all humanity, especially those who refuse to continue hiding who they really are.

Unfortunately, many feel a strong sense of need to adhere to a set of religious beliefs that have been taught to them. Beliefs that are fear based rather than love based.

I fully realize this is an emotionally charged topic and is often seen as divisive, with only polar views, so that any stand I voice may be both popular and unpopular.

Okay, now it’s obvious to me why I wanted to resist this post.

But I have to take a stand.

I believe in love. Love opens, expands, embraces, forgives, accepts, is compassionate, caring and, valuing. It is the foundation of everything.

I also believe that the only role that fear plays is to be a messenger, a guide, a redirection from itself back to a state of love. Fear is meant to be temporary. Love is meant to be permanent.

I stand with all those who believe in love and encourage all those who believe in fear to use it to return to love. Everything is out in the open in love and nothing is hidden, nor does it need to be. I believe we all are meant to be who we are in this life. We have free will for this very purpose and it is not up to anyone to control another’s view of their life. I believe love offers us all a chance to embrace our lives in the ways we choose.

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Completion

While away on a break from writing original posts I thought I’d share some of my favorites with you from the past three and a half years. In mid-March I’ll return with more original posts. Until then, please enjoy these.

A while ago I mentioned to you that I had chosen a task which would significantly challenge me. My son, Tommy, had told me about something called a Misogi.

Research informed me that it is an ancient Japanese Shinto practice where monks and their student would embark on a long journey high up into the mountains in search of a waterfall. The students, wearing thin short robes, would stand under the cold streaming water performing a ritual intended to purify their bodies and their minds.

An updated version is practiced by folks desiring to challenge and perhaps in some way, purify themselves. Those interested must choose something which they believe has a fifty percent or better chance of failure, and which will not harm themself or others.

I spent a bit of time wondering about this. It felt necessary. Important. Vital to me, especially because I wanted to perform it prior to my birthday.

I cast about for a difficult task and chose to walk from one end to the other and back on a Rail Trail close to my home. I speculated the distance would be somewhere between 18 and 19 miles.

The longest distance I’d ever walked in my life was a little over 16 miles and that was many years ago when I was in far better physical shape. Nothing much hurt in my body and I felt relatively fit.

I wondered, was it even possible for me to complete this journey?

Despite understanding how challenging it would be, I knew deep inside me that it was important. I could not have told you why, I just knew.

And so, I began to figure things out. I’d need to go on some ‘practice walks’, distances that would offer me a sense of what I might experience on my Misogi and prepare my body and my mind.

My first long walk was a little over 8 miles and my second just shy of 10 miles. Each of them provided keen insights I felt would ultimately benefit me.

Tommy asked if he could join me, which I immediately jumped at, knowing the shared experience would last a lifetime.

Today is my 71st birthday and I wanted to let you know that we completed the full distance (19.5 miles) last Saturday, August 19, 2023.

The significance of this adventure is still dawning on me.

We had a wonderful time catching up and sharing our lives, further bonding us. I am so grateful that we could do this together and know it would have been so much more difficult had I done this solo. We compared notes about our physical aches and pains and often checked our mileage to the finish line. When we made it, we celebrated with orange bubble gum cigars.

During the days that followed, I wondered whether there was anything in my life that was purified? Were some ‘contaminants’ removed? Did I feel cleansed in some way?

What was the purpose of my Misogi? Did I prove something to myself? Would I do it again?

If you thought about it, what Misogi would you choose for yourself? How demanding would it be? Can you tolerate the thought of failure? Are you driven by the allure of success?

In the end, I believe I wanted to test my sense of resolve. Could I, would I complete my chosen task, or would I give in? This task became less about success or failure and more about connecting to my inner strength. A strength that could overcome obstacles and challenges, regardless of the difficulties.

I freely admit I hit a physical pain wall at about 14 miles, and there was a moment of temptation to stop and give up. But something inside me refused to seriously consider the idea. I tapped into a reserve. I willed my body to continue moving for the next 5.5 miles, one stride at a time, knowing I could do it.

I think this is why I did this. To prove to myself that I could if I willed it.

I hope you can tap into your own inner reserve and accomplish whatever you set out to achieve in your life.