Category: revelation

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Nothing For Granted

I’ve been thinking about how often I seem to take things for granted. Maybe this happens to you too.

I began wondering why. Could it be that my mind is just too busy with other things or is there something deeper going on?

There was a somewhat melancholy feeling running through me and words started flowing onto a page in my journal. I thought I’d share them with you, so that maybe together we could remind ourselves to take nothing for granted.

Nothing For Granted

Life is precious,

Sometimes staying in one place,

Sometimes leaping head.

I want to remember it all.

I wonder to myself about things,

About moments I experience,

What if this were my last hug,

The last spoke word I’ll ever hear,

What if this were my last sunset,

Last long soothing shower I’ll ever have,

Last delicious meal I’ll eat,

Or song I’ll hear,

Or walk I’ll take,

What if it’s the last firefly I’ll see light up

On a hot summer night,

Last starlit sky,

Last new spring green explosion of leaves I’ll see,

Or the last brilliant colorful autumn extravaganza,

What if it’s the last time I’ll feel the warmth of a cozy blanket,

Or the sunshine on my face,

What if this was the last time I’ll feel my wife’s lips against mine,

Would it change what it means to me

To be alive,

Would I treasure it,

Savor it,

Breath into it.

Would I try to hold onto it for dear life.

I wonder,

What do I want my life to be like.

So,

I sit with all of this

And let it wash over me

And I know what I want,

I want everything

To mean something to me,

Every sting,

Every fall and rise,

Every illusive dream,

Hurt, hope, every breath,

Every face and heart connection,

I want the whole collection of life,

Because it all matters.

And what I want most

Is to feel alive

And connected

And

I want to take nothing for granted,

Ever

I am curious what things you’d put on your list. Maybe you are too.

Be well.

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Kicked Out of the Nest

I’ve always heard that if young birds don’t leave the nest, one of their parents will kick them out, forcing them to fly.

Apparently, this is a myth. According to experts, this doesn’t happen, although young birds are definitely coaxed into flying. Despite thinking it’s safe in the nest, having a group of loud squawking birds sitting together is an invitation to many predators, so it’s in the young bird’s interest to jump out and fly away.

The moral of this story has become self-evident to me over the years.

I like to stick around where it feels safe. I know the rules, even if I don’t always like them all. I have a good idea what I can and cannot do and my options seem pretty clear. Part of me isn’t interested in venturing outward, where everything seems confusing and uncertain.

But, like a young bird, it isn’t always safer in the nest and taking flight and finding new and better places to be is to my advantage, no matter how difficult or challenging it can be.

Recently, I experienced this situation again. For me, there is a period of discomfort that occurs, mostly on an emotional level. When I feel ousted from my nest, my first reaction is either fear or anger. When I gain a little distance, I see that fear and anger are really the same emotion, just acted out differently.

Many years ago, our wise minister (Jim Fuller) mentioned how important it was for all of us to feel our feelings. I understood his point but was not very good at accepting or processing my feelings. I was a ‘thinker’, so feelings seemed to take second place, which really meant no place at all.

I decided I ought to give it a more serious try, so I began a feelings journal where I promised to be honest and write down exactly what I was feeling and then sit with them. Not try to change my feelings or ignore them or discount them. Just be with them. As time went on, I came to learn that my feelings were guides for helping me navigate a better life course.

So, back to the nest.

Each time I am forced out of my cozy nest, which happens with regularity, I allow myself to feel my feelings, then sit and rest with them. Once the initial energy subsides, I can see there is a purpose and a new direction for me to travel. A direction that opens me up and offers me a prosperity I would never have known if I’d chosen to stay in the nest.

I know this is hard. I know you might think there is nothing out there beyond your comfort zone…but there is.

I’m writing this to invite you to give yourself a chance to discover a bigger, brighter, bolder world.

Every time this has happened to me, I have grown and experienced satisfaction and joy.

If you give yourself a chance, I hope you find new dimensions and beautiful experiences waiting for you.

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Time to Reconsider

I have many teachers in my life, some exist in proximity to me, others are farther away. Each of them reminds me of things I want to learn to release or to be at peace with. They are predominantly things that irritate, annoy or upset me.

I guess by now I ought to be used to this, but I’m not.

If I am not careful, I get sucked into their orbit and react in kind. This does not serve me.

To be at peace, I know I need to release any attachment to my version of what is ‘right’. I wonder to myself, how is this done?

At first glance, I’m tempted to accept and embrace what my culture has taught me, which is that I deserve to feel the way I do, about anything. If I can find someone who shares my feelings or who otherwise supports my right to feel the way I do, I have no incentive to make any changes, despite the amount of conflict and internal suffering I experience.

Feeling justified is an end unto itself and it halts all other thoughts and holds me in place.

The other thing it does is it creates a host of troublesome feelings inside me and ultimately keeps me from any sense of peace or freedom.

It’s too high a price to pay.

My feelings create a crack in the doorway, a place where some light comes in. And when the light hits my feelings, I sense there is the possibility for change.

Perhaps my view of the world is wrong. Perhaps there’s another way to view my situation that would be better for me. Perhaps I don’t have to stay in the rut created by constant reinforcement.

This feels like good news to me. I try to open my eyes and heart further. What change could I make that would allow my life to be more peaceful, contented, even joyful?

The first thing that occurs to me is that I could remind myself that there are numerous ways to live in this world. This translates as, my way may not be the best or only way and others’ views might make more sense.

It takes some inner strength to say this out loud to myself. For whatever reason, it’s challenging for me to think I have it wrong, but what a wonderful opportunity it is for me to entertain this idea.

This whole concept is one of suspended belief and judgement. A sort of time out or pause, so that I can reconsider what I believe.

It’s a mind opening invitation I can give myself.

If I sit back and think about any given situation from a neutral position, maybe I’ll see a bigger picture, one that may offer me a wider view and provide space to see if what I believe still rings true.

It feels like a wise choice to make and I’m going to give it a try.

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What If Today…

I want to share something that I wrote for a dear friend of mine recently. It was intended to provide a spark to ignite a different way of viewing life. It was something that I needed. As with all of my posts, the thoughts and words arrive for me and then moved outward into the world.

The post is a dream in a way. Of a richer life. And of course, as it is in all cases, it depends on what we choose. I wonder to myself what will I choose, I wonder too, what will you choose?

What if today…

What if today…I choose to believe…to truly accept and embrace…that every single thing that happens to me is here to benefit me. What if I choose to see beyond appearances and all of the things that blind me. What if I give myself permission to believe that I am loved and cared for and know that everything I experience in my life is there to offer me something of value. That no matter what the world tells me, I can choose my own path. What if I embrace that my heart and spirit are the ones that set me free.

What if today I release any need to control the uncontrollable. What if I spruce up my ability to yield and let go of all the things that weigh me down…to set them aside and feel the precious liberation and the expansive freedom that choice creates.

What if today I collect all the most lovable parts of me and hug them and ask them to spread their joy throughout my body…my life.

What if today I allow every sorrow, pain, challenge, and concern to take the day off…to rest…what if I placed them all gently in the ocean of bliss that is my true home, where they can be washed clean.

What if, for one day, I give up needing to be in charge of anything and allow life to flow gently through me.

What if today…I breathe in peace and breathe out love.

What if today…is that day.

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Endings and Beginnings

It occurred to me recently that there are a lot of examples of endings in my life. Some of them are okay with me, but others are filled with sadness. Perhaps you face the same thing in your life, despite our examples being different.

I’ve been spending a great deal of time preparing for a garage sale that my daughter, Jenny and I are having soon. It involves a huge number of decisions on my part. Maybe like others, my basement is a certifiable disaster area. Years ago, we had a flood and I had to throw out a ton of stuff but felt other things would be safe. It turns out, they weren’t. Over the years they’ve acquired a terrible, damp, moldy smell and they have to go.

Fortunately, there are salvageable items. Enough so that I had to make literally 50 trips from the basement to the garage.

Among the items were my golf clubs, which generated my first ‘ending’. I’ve kept them in the basement even though I haven’t played in years and am unlikely to ever play again. But I kept them there because I wasn’t ready to admit to myself that I was done playing. I have very pleasant memories of playing golf, being out on the course, walking on the freshly cut grass, among family or friends, sharing both the good and bad shots. Even though my back won’t tolerate playing any more, I was reluctant to give them up. It was too sad an ending for me.

On several racks, taking up a lot of space, was all of my camping gear. My best friend, Doug, and I did a great deal of camping and canoeing together, and we both loved it. Being out in nature, testing ourselves and our skills against the challenges, was a wonderful experience. To put these things in the trash or the garage sale meant I was done with them. That it’s over. More sorrow for me.

There are other endings that surround me.

When I was seventeen and on my high school’s JV soccer team I was on the field and got hit directly in the face with a soccer ball. It hurt but I recovered. Unfortunately, my two front teeth took the brunt of the force, and both were damaged. Over the years they discolored and a couple weeks ago, my left front tooth had to be extracted. I’m now left with a big gap until it can be repaired. The surgery and recovery were quite painful, and I really miss my tooth. I can’t bite anything with my other front tooth at this point, so have to cut up my food. I miss eating like I used to, and it feels like an ending to me.

Other endings surfaced when I started thinking about this topic. Among them are the loss of friends, whether to cancer or suicide or moving away. No matter the reason, it’s hard to take because they each represent an ending to me and are filled with sadness.

I needed to sit back, to pause and consider, what does all of this mean to me? Where do I put the pain, sorrow, and sadness? What other way might I see this to gain a different perspective?

The answer that showed up was, that all endings are also new beginnings. Or they can be if I allow and encourage them to be.

I wondered what I would have to do to make this real. Perhaps it was as simple as telling myself it would serve me best to make the shift.

So, I sat and consciously, intentionally, reviewed each ‘ending’ and reframed them as new beginnings. I recognized that I could get lost in the sorrow of each of my endings, but I could also shift my perspective and view them as new beginnings and the start of new adventures.

I decided to give my golf clubs to my grandson, Evan, so that they can be his and that he can have a bit of my legacy. I decided that although I wouldn’t be camping outside in the same way as before, I could go anywhere and do anything I wanted. There are thousands of VRBOs and Air B&Bs available to me. I decided that even though I have lost some friends, I am capable and desirous of making new friends and sharing new adventures with them. And I’ve committed to believing that there will be good bone growth, so that a new tooth (crown) can be placed where there is currently a gap, restoring my dental health.

What I discovered, while allowing myself to feel the full weight of the sorrow of some endings, was that I have other choices too. I can release the sadness and embrace the enchantment of new beginnings, making my world a better place for myself.

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Whole Rather Than Perfect

I’ve thought a lot about the idea of perfection over the course of my life. I wonder if you have too. There is certainly a great deal of emphasis placed on it. Our cultural training seems to glorify perfection and encourages us to achieve it.

One of the main problems in my opinion is the state of perfection does not exist as a reality. It’s only an ideal. According to one internet source the definition of perfection is the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects.

Consider that for a moment. Free of ALL flaws or defects. Not just some. Not almost all. Free from ALL.

Why would anyone be tempted to be perfect?

I know that for me, it never worked and that’s not for a lack of trying. There was always some aspect I could not accomplish, no matter how hard I tried. And I’ve seen so many others pursue their goals with the idea in mind that they could do it perfectly. They didn’t. They couldn’t.

At some point part of the mystery of perfection revealed itself to me. It may only be my personal revelation, but it might be something you would agree with.

Perfection is the ultimate challenge and cannot be achieved, or at least it cannot be sustained. Underneath the concept of perfection is a host of other demons. The feelings of unworthiness, and the overall sense of not being enough or of value. These all seem to me to go together, like a bunch of bullies that taunt you and try to put you down.

I believe that perfection is an earth word. Something dreamed up to separate us and create unhappiness. It invites us into a conditional world, where no one stands at the top, but folks can take satisfaction from being better than those below them.

I’m through with the word. I am releasing it from my vocabulary, along with the word, ‘should’. They are banned words now to me.

Part of me asked the question…is there an actual word that can replace perfection, something I can acknowledge and appreciate?

For me, one word stepped forward to fill the empty space…’wholeness’.

I need to explain my definition so you can see whether it fills in your empty space too.

Wholeness, for me, is a process, not an end result. I believe we all came to earth ‘whole’ and complete, inherently valuable, worthwhile, rare, and gifted, beautiful and loved. True, we’ve all fallen off the straight line of tracks, but it’s of no real consequence since we are still in the process.

There is no need for any comparison, feelings of lack, judgement, or criticism. Those all belong to perfection, so we can leave them by the side of the road.

Wholeness invites us forward, encouraging our dreams and opening our hearts. There is an unconditional love, peace and sense of joy attached.

Perfection yields sorrow, while wholeness creates soaring, drawing us upward into freedom.

Wholeness is a Heaven word. Wholeness is something we came here with and if we choose it consciously, consistently, open heartedly, it gets bigger. And the bigger it becomes the more joy there is, for us and all those around us.

I love the word, wholeness, and I am giving it a special place inside me to grow.

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Speaking Your Truth

If someone asked you what speaking your truth means to you, what would you say?

Some might say that it means being honest with others about how you feel and what you think. Or it could mean expressing yourself in a way that mirrors your inner thoughts and ideas clearly, so that another understands your position about something.

It might also mean taking a stand about something truly important to you. And maybe even more critically, taking action to ensure others know how dedicated you are to whatever cause or concern you support.

When I was thinking about what I consider to be my answer, I reflected on a number of obstacles that get in my way making it difficult to speak my truth. Perhaps you’ve encountered some of them as well.

In my ordinary day to day life, it is often challenging to separate out what is most important to me from the host of tasks I feel I need to complete on any given day. Some of the mundane chores seem to take up so much time that it feels like I run out of time. I’m sure this is not really the case, but it feels like it to me and I recognize my perceptions rule my life.

Another, and very different issue, is that I can initially become quite concerned about what others think about what I say (speaking my truth) and either disagree with me or disregard me. I realize I have no control over their reactions, nor do I really want any, and that it is wise to release any vested interest in their opinions, but a human part of me is tempted anyway.

An additional obstacle is that I don’t always fully know what my truth is. I may have picked up on hints or formed parts of what feels like the truth to me, but it’s not always completely formed or not clear enough for me to see it or speak it.

Courage is yet another challenge in speaking my truth. I suspect I am not the only one who fears not being accepted by others, even while knowing I’ll probably never have enough insight to truly know what they think or feel.

Beyond that, speaking my truth is ultimately not about being accepted by others, having them agree with my views or supporting me in any tangible ways.

Speaking my truth (or you speaking yours) is about exploring and discovering what lies inside you, in your heart and in your spirit. And once revealed, allowing it to grow and flourish, so that it can be shared with the world.

And believe me, it’s there for that very purpose.

I feel strongly that each of us has within us parts of the whole. We share a connection to the one, the divine, where everything is known. Speaking our truth out loud encourages those around us to do the same. We all learn from each other. We all can invite each other into our inner worlds and thrive together.

At one point in my life, a few years ago, I made a conscious decision to speak my truth, both inside and outside of me.

Inside of me, I chose to spend solitary time talking with (god), as I’ve mentioned several times in these posts and to journal and meditate and walk, contemplating what I believe or know to be true for me.

Springing from this deep source, I’ve come to the conclusion that what is important to me to be shared is what I feel the truth is about life. To speak out loud so that others may hear my words, not to convince or sway, but to invite them to consider if there is any value for them in what I choose to say.

Speaking my truth then becomes a witness of what I perceive about the nature of things, in an effort to share my depth with other’s depth, and in that sharing we all become a part of the one.

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Searching for Beliefs

Where do our beliefs come from?

Most likely some are taught to us directly, while others we seem to absorb without knowing when or where they came from.

Then there are beliefs we choose for ourselves with intention. If I think about my life, there are beliefs I hold, both because they have a strong appeal to me and ones, I’ve chosen in reaction to what others attempted to force upon me.

Choosing our beliefs may take quite a while. We might feel it’s important to spend the time to sift through all the fiction to find the facts. And even then, it can be overwhelming because certain facts feel very slippery. What is undeniable one day can change over time. Add to that, that the experts don’t agree, and that new research is always occurring and our comfort level with the beliefs we’ve chosen may decline further.

There are other difficulties in the process. Here’s just one simple example.

Have you ever been to the doctor’s office and seen the height chart attached to the wall? You’re asked to stand with your back against it, while the nurse or doctor determines your exact height. There is an underlying assumption that the chart was correctly installed. But suppose that it wasn’t? If it was placed an inch or two above the floor, your height measurement would be wrong. If you’re fully grown when the measurement is taken, you’re likely to live the rest of your life believing an inaccurate measurement.

The same can be true for all your beliefs. If the basis for them is incorrect, the conclusion is incorrect.

I’ve observed that forming my beliefs spans quite a breadth. It’s not all about the facts of life. My beliefs run the distance from intellectual to physical to emotional to spiritual and beyond.

I have to remind myself that sometimes what I’ve been taught is merely someone’s opinion. It’s their perspective and not something I want nor need to accept. That feels very important to me.

At certain times in my life I’ve been told, either out loud or by another’s actions, that I am not very smart or capable or worthwhile. It becomes my decision to accept or reject these statements and believe what I choose.

It’s everyone’s right to challenge beliefs they already have or are in the process of forming. For intellectual decisions it seems reasonable to learn all the facts we can, from as many sources as possible, then choose what appears to be the best answer, while keeping in mind that what we choose needs to be flexible. It feels wise to recognize, that as new facts become available, we can alter our beliefs and that nothing is cast in stone.

When considering emotional beliefs, I’ve found it wisest to ask for input from those I trust most, but to also rely on my feelings and intuition, which can be wonderful guides, alerting me to truths that lie beyond the facts.

As for spiritual beliefs, I rely on my relationship with (god) for all my answers. I believe that each of us is directly connected to the divine, who is always available, waiting for a chance to be present in our lives. Going within ourselves gives us an opportunity to discover truths we can not find in the world around us. Time and time again, by calming my breathing, quieting to silence the outside world, and opening my heart, a way forward will appear. There are of course times I need to be patient, but a part of my truth always comes to fill me.

I believe that you can be filled too, should you decide to open your heart to your inner world.

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Revelation

My idea in writing these posts is to put forth as close to the real me as I can, rather than hold back what feels like my truth. I believe everyone, when they hear or read something, will know if it speaks to them and if it does, they’ll want the full story.

What I’m sharing today is my conversation with god from Friday, January 28, 2022. I share it in the hope that you will find something of value in it for your life. Here it is…

I believe it would be helpful for me to ease back on the throttle for a while. I’ve had my foot pretty heavy on the gas for a long time now.

I wonder, what does this mean- practically speaking?

I lean back in my chair and try to let what’s calling me most come and sit next to me and… let it matter.

Can I do this? I don’t actually know because my nature is to associate myself with what I produce. To identify with my results. No results, means no me.

I know this is errant thinking. I am where my thoughts come from, the source of everything, the deep well inside of me that is connected to the divine. I can think I am something or anything else, but this is only a thought. It is not real.

It is part of my free will, the blessed allowance I have that can choose to experience my life from any direction.

What I wonder is, why I’ve chosen to push myself so hard and to try to expand outward in so many directions, sometimes all at once?

Why aren’t I more aware of my own inherent, majestic connection to the divine?

What could be so much better about striving to reach so many earthly goals and accomplishments?

I have so many practical questions. What I need are some practical answers. Answers that don’t send me more outside of myself.

How is this to happen?

Time to practice what I preach and go inside and ask for my divine connection to open to me. For this to happen I need to be quiet and allow the world to slip away and to breathe as if each breath is breathing me. To gently close my eyes and open my heart and wait.

I know the divine lives inside of me and I know it will speak to me, comfort me, love me and lift me up.

I prime the connection by giving gratitude in advance, not as a device to get what I want and need, but as a sacred offering, my outside love, to receive my inside love.

A voice, like the first breeze that brings spring, enters me. It flows through me, cleansing me and sweeping away all that clutters my life. Ahhh, now I can listen clearly.

“Divine child, magnificent being, all is yours already. All a part of the whole. It all exists in full form. There is no need to create it, only to reveal it. How you spend your time is yours to choose.”

Does the voice truly mean this? Can my life be this simple?

Perhaps I don’t understand what it means for a thing to be revealed, rather than created.

I consider another moment. There is no perhaps about it, I don’t understand.

“It is not the action, but rather the belief which matters. For something to appear real to you, you believe it must be created, so you fill your life with acts of creation. But the truth is that all things already exist. When you choose to believe this as your truth, life becomes much simpler. This belief offers you the patience you need in order to reveal the truth, rather than attempting to create it.”

I know the truth for me when I hear it. I know now that there is wisdom in releasing one belief and embracing another.

And I know, I want revelation far more than creation.