Tag: experience

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Apology, Cost or Blessing

Have you ever considered that an apology could come at a cost to you or instead, be a huge blessing?

It’s interesting to me that the statement can be interpreted from several different directions. Perhaps the apology comes from you, but maybe the apology is offered to you.

Do you feel the same way in both circumstances?

Sometimes it depends on when the apology happens. If it’s too far into the future from the incident, it might lose its value. It also matters whether the apology is sincere or not, because without sincerity the words would not represent an expression of real sorrow or remorse, a kind of ‘non-apology’ apology.

So much goes into the act of an apology. It can be extremely difficult to know where you stand, as the one apologizing or the one being apologized to.

If you’ve seen my Facebook and Instagram posts, you’ll be familiar with the four-word questions I pose that have beautiful background art works created by my dear friend, Cheri Warren.

Together, we created a 52-card oracle deck which we hope to have available for folks who are interested. (More about that in the future- Self Discovery Cards, A 52 Card Deck that guides you to your true self).

What I wanted to share was that one way to use the cards is to shuffle the deck and choose one card at random, then answer the question posed.

I wanted to try the cards out for myself, so opened the pack, shuffled, chose one and flipped it over to reveal a card. It happened to be the one with this Post’s title, Apology, Cost or Blessing. I felt no connection to the card. It didn’t spark anything inside of me and I was a bit disappointed.

However, an hour or so later…wham! A string of meaningful thoughts arrived, seemingly out of nowhere. After the shock of recognition, a further question popped up.

‘To whom do I need to apologize?’

I sat with that, pondering. Then three words showed up…’Me, that’s who’.

I’d never considered that when the question came up. I’d immediately thought about what person I needed to apologize to or who had offended me enough that I’d expect an apology from them.

So, why me? Why would I need to apologize to myself?

A voice inside me spoke saying, “because you’ve released our power. You’ve let it leak out of us.” It was a somewhat angry voice and I realized it was my ego speaking. It was demanding to be heard saying, “you don’t stick up for us”.

I realized it was the truth and that there were many situations I allowed my power to ebb away. I felt truly sorry that my actions had caused myself pain and sorrow. I apologized and committed to make some important changes, ones that would hopefully keep this from happening again.

I recognize how this simple apology cost nothing but has created many blessings for me. I can be more honest in the moment, watching carefully what I do and say and making sure it is in harmony and alignment with my life plan, with who I am here to be. I am so happy that I chose that particular four-word question and look forward to the next one I choose, realizing it might take a moment or two before it reveals some deep truth to me

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Whole Rather Than Perfect

I’ve thought a lot about the idea of perfection over the course of my life. I wonder if you have too. There is certainly a great deal of emphasis placed on it. Our cultural training seems to glorify perfection and encourages us to achieve it.

One of the main problems in my opinion is the state of perfection does not exist as a reality. It’s only an ideal. According to one internet source the definition of perfection is the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects.

Consider that for a moment. Free of ALL flaws or defects. Not just some. Not almost all. Free from ALL.

Why would anyone be tempted to be perfect?

I know that for me, it never worked and that’s not for a lack of trying. There was always some aspect I could not accomplish, no matter how hard I tried. And I’ve seen so many others pursue their goals with the idea in mind that they could do it perfectly. They didn’t. They couldn’t.

At some point part of the mystery of perfection revealed itself to me. It may only be my personal revelation, but it might be something you would agree with.

Perfection is the ultimate challenge and cannot be achieved, or at least it cannot be sustained. Underneath the concept of perfection is a host of other demons. The feelings of unworthiness, and the overall sense of not being enough or of value. These all seem to me to go together, like a bunch of bullies that taunt you and try to put you down.

I believe that perfection is an earth word. Something dreamed up to separate us and create unhappiness. It invites us into a conditional world, where no one stands at the top, but folks can take satisfaction from being better than those below them.

I’m through with the word. I am releasing it from my vocabulary, along with the word, ‘should’. They are banned words now to me.

Part of me asked the question…is there an actual word that can replace perfection, something I can acknowledge and appreciate?

For me, one word stepped forward to fill the empty space…’wholeness’.

I need to explain my definition so you can see whether it fills in your empty space too.

Wholeness, for me, is a process, not an end result. I believe we all came to earth ‘whole’ and complete, inherently valuable, worthwhile, rare, and gifted, beautiful and loved. True, we’ve all fallen off the straight line of tracks, but it’s of no real consequence since we are still in the process.

There is no need for any comparison, feelings of lack, judgement, or criticism. Those all belong to perfection, so we can leave them by the side of the road.

Wholeness invites us forward, encouraging our dreams and opening our hearts. There is an unconditional love, peace and sense of joy attached.

Perfection yields sorrow, while wholeness creates soaring, drawing us upward into freedom.

Wholeness is a Heaven word. Wholeness is something we came here with and if we choose it consciously, consistently, open heartedly, it gets bigger. And the bigger it becomes the more joy there is, for us and all those around us.

I love the word, wholeness, and I am giving it a special place inside me to grow.

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Going Wrong

You know by now if you’ve been reading my posts for a while that I constantly wonder about things.

Here’s my latest.

Is going ‘wrong’, only going ‘right in disguise’? Is it possible that I am misperceiving a situation and that I’m just not far enough down the road to realize the ‘rightness’ involved?

Maybe I would be served by standing back a bit and asking myself, “is it true or just my perception of the truth”?

Perhaps it would help if I took a brief inventory of the facts. Or recognized that what I might consider to be mistakes are just segways, not ends to themselves.

Another thought jumps in and joins the party.

How do I define wrong? From what point of view? From what chronological reference? Do I base it on my own thoughts or what I perceive to be my cultural training? Or am I starting from an ideal, so that any deviation becomes a problem?

The narrower my definition, the harder it is for me to consider things as being right and the easier for them to be wrong. Either way can be a slippery slope.

As is so often the case, I searched for an example or two, hoping to provide myself with some clarity. Fortunately, two good examples spring to mind that I thought I’d share with you. Perhaps they will spark some insight as you think about your own life.

The very first event in my life that felt ‘wrong’ in every way was when my parents told my sister and me that we were moving from Watertown to Delmar, New York. Immediately I realized my whole world would be tipped upside down. I wouldn’t get to see all of my friends, go to the same school, know how to get anywhere and a host of other upsetting things.

There was no way I was interested in changing my life. How could they just up and move us 185 miles away from where I wanted to be? More maddening still, I did not even have a vote. They decided and it was done.

I don’t know if you ever had to leave a place you wanted to stay, but it’s a hard thing and it felt truly ‘wrong’ to me.

But here’s where some time and distance becomes a key.

Were it not for moving, I would never have met my amazing, wonderful wife. And without her in my life, we would not have our two incredible, joyful children. And without our children, we would not have our delightful, gorgeous grandchildren.

And the list of blessings spirals out in all directions, other family members, friends, church life, our house. I would have none of these beautiful things in my life.

In light of this, how could I ever think my parents’ decision to move my sister and me was wrong?

My other example is also obvious to me, once I step away for a better view.

My job was eliminated. I had not planned on retiring for another couple of years and I wasn’t ready to leave, but I wasn’t given a choice. I was told I was done, no longer employed! It was a crushing blow, especially the way it was done. It felt ‘wrong’ to me.

But it opened doors for me. I had the opportunity to join my wife in babysitting our two local grandchildren. I consider this to be my favorite, most rewarding, best of all possible careers. To spend quality time with them has been a sheer delight and something I will remember forever.

Again, I had to ask myself, how could this event in my life have been ‘wrong’ when I have loved it so much? My answer is simple. The happenings to me were not wrong, they were just the right things wearing a disguise that took time to see through. I only needed to shift my perspective a little and see the clarity that was there all along

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Heaven and Earth

I’d like to invite you to join me on a short journey. It won’t take long, unless you want it to.

I was having a conversation this morning with Lia, an ethereal feminine voice of god that speaks with me and answers questions I can’t answer for myself. This morning I asked her about heaven and earth and our experiences of each.

As with so many of our conversations, it stretched my human mind.

I try very hard to follow along, for me, but also for you, so that I can share what feels like the truth. Of course, what feels like the truth to me, may or may not feel like the truth to you and I honor that. I don’t believe anyone is served by accepting another’s words, unless they sense the truth in them for themselves.

Here is what Lia shared with me.

In heaven, you know everything there is to know BUT you don’t ‘experience’ it. From an earth perspective it would be the difference between the ‘idea’ of love versus being hugged by someone and ‘feeling’ loved.

In heaven you know earth is a place where duality exists (good/bad, right/wrong). And it is a place where you can choose what to experience. You can exercise your free will, which allows you to create and experience the outcomes that happen based on your choices, some of which you anticipate and others that you do not. Your life is shaped by what you conceive and believe and by the actions you take. You can live without any awareness of heaven or with a full remembering that you are a part of one essence, one pure unconditional love.

In heaven you know that your stay on earth is temporary and that you will always return to heaven once you are done with your earth experience.

Some who come to earth choose to remember their true nature, that they are a part of one essence. They come to experience their earth life, while also knowing the truth. Most of these earth essences are teachers, guides for others, offering insight about the truth.

In heaven, each essence is a unique energetic vibrational frequency and as such chooses certain life paths and events to be a part of their earth life plan (spiritual blueprint). They do this because they want to know what life feels like. There is a yearning to experience these things that earth life offer and that heaven does not.

No one requires this. It is a free will choice each essence makes.

In order to fully experiences parts of this plan, each essence consciously allows their awareness of the truth to be forgotten when they transition for heaven to earth.

Imagine playing a game here on earth but knowing the exact outcome before you start. Would that be a fun or meaningful way to play a game? Likely not.

This forgetting includes the events and the reasons for the events.

In heaven, each essence is able to choose any path, even and perhaps especially the ones that we as humans would not choose, because they are too painful in some way.

In heaven, one of the most beautiful knowings is that earth is temporary, and heaven is permanent. ALL essences who chose to experience earth, return to heaven, without exception.

Each essence is pure unconditional love, whether they appear that way on earth or not.

Each essence has free will, so can choose to experience earth in any way. Many essences choose to experience shattering events, which would seem an unlikely choice and yet many individuals involved say, they would not have it any other way because of what came out of the experience for them. Earth life is full of these examples.

To make sense of what seems senseless is not an easy shift. It may challenge earthly logic too much and more insight may be needed. All answers do not come at once. But once an essence returns to heaven and merges back into the one, all is once again known.

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Write Your Own Story

Do you like to read stories? Do you have a favorite subject or style? Is there an author you’re especially fond of?

If you wrote your own story, what would the title be? And just for fun…what movie star would play your role?

I love to write. Even as a child I loved to write, as long as it was my own idea. I remember sitting in a small room at the front of our house that my mom used as a sewing room. When my grandmother came for a visit, I’d sleep in this room. It had the most comfortable bed in the world (what our family referred to as the ‘slab lounge’).

It was the site of my first story. I was perhaps 9 or 10 years old, and I was infatuated with the FBI, so of course my story was about them going after a bad guy by the name of Shootist Mc Rowan. It was about ten pages long, but it pleased me to be able to say I’d written something, even if the only person that knew about it was me.

Fast forward over fifty years, one wife, two children, two careers, three grandchildren and the freedom of retirement. If you’d asked me if I’d ever thought I would be a published author, I would have said it was ‘highly unlikely’.

But life has a way of contradicting us.

Currently I’m writing the fifth book in a spiritual fiction series titled. Little Buddha (Books One-Four). It may seem boastful, but I can’t help it, I am in love with the characters, each of whom ‘speak to me’. They guide the series wherever it goes, and I follow along. I get to be a contributor, but am mostly the scribe, enjoying the cast and learning from them. It’s an incredible dance and I couldn’t be happier that they’ve invited me into their world.

What if you could write your own story, not the kind I’m writing, but a story about you.

I suspect you already are. I suspect you’ve been writing it for a long time and that parts of it may feel like they are cast in stone, unmovable, unchangeable.

It feels to me that we all do this every day of our lives. We tell ourselves what we need, have to, or should do. We may alter our supporting cast by discontinuing some characters or search for new ones we believe will be better for us.

But the central core of the story is ours. What are you telling yourself? Are the words harsh, judgmental, untrue, indifferent? Or do you offer yourself congratulations, give yourself freedom to make mistakes, learn, grow, love?

What if you could re-write your story?

What would you change? If you took a few moments to consider this, what would you write down? If you’re feeling courageous, you could even do that right now.

I know it might be difficult but imagine the rewards you could reap.

When I turned seventy (still hard to believe I’m that old, since I still feel mentally like I’m 24) I had some intense feelings about my story. I’d been telling myself for years that my physical health was sliding. I couldn’t do all the things I’d been able to do, or at least not easily, and I worried that I wouldn’t be able to enjoy my ‘golden years’.

So, I decided it was time to change my story and tell myself a new one. I focused a tremendous amount of energy on my physical being. I changed several eating habits, increased my exercising and walking, altered my vitamin regime, began a weigh weights program, increased my chiropractor, massage and energy work therapies, and added a whole new element to my routine- cold water therapy, which if you’ve been with me, you read about recently.

What this tells me is that I am in charge of my own story. I don’t have to believe what others say about ‘older people’ nor what the news tells us.

I can believe what I tell me. I can write my own story.

And so can you. And you can do it about anything if you really want to. There is no shortage of folks who will help you if you need assistance. You just need to ask. I hope you do.

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Heart Wide Open

What are your biggest dreams? The ones you would love to experience most in your life. Maybe you already have a list, one that you think about often.

If you stopped for a moment or two, what’s at the top of your list? It could be a to have a truly meaningful relationship with a spouse, parent, child, friend, or favorite animal. Perhaps it would be the perfect job, house, car, or vacation.

You might live in a place where there is war, oppression, violence, disease, or other traumatic events, in which case maybe your biggest, wildest dream is peace, health, harmony, caring or prosperity.

You might live with certain oppressions surrounding you and dream of a time where everyone lives in a safe, prosperous place where there is equity and opportunity.

There are so many situations we all face and sometimes we get an uneven mixture of the good and bad stuff, which can make it more difficult to remain calm and optimistic about our life.

One of my biggest dreams is to live with my heart wide open.

The world can seem like an incredibly difficult place to live and the idea of opening our hearts wide to it may feel frighteningly unsafe, especially if we’ve been hurt often, by others or through our own actions.

It’s easily understood why we might tend to cover our hearts or put-up barriers to protect ourselves. I have certainly done this on many occasions. The problem is that every time I do this, it shuts another part of me off from the rest of creation. It limits me and shrinks me. It draws me inward and disconnects me from the beautiful, majestic, magical world where we all live.

I have trained myself to step back whenever I sense a problem confronting me and to give it some distance. That’s what I’m doing right now. I’m giving myself a chance to capture an image that will help guide me to a better way to live.

And one appears, both surprising and delighting me. The vision is of a dreamcatcher, which is a hoop with a web stretching across it, creating connections and empty spaces. For many, the belief is that during the night’s sleep, the web let’s all of the good dreams through, but catches and traps all of the bad dreams, allowing the sleeper to have a wonderful, protected, restful sleep.

A dear friend of mine made one for me and it hangs over my bed, offering me peace and tranquility.

But what does this have to do with living with a heart wide open?

Actually, a lot.

What if I could apply the dreamcatcher idea here? What if I could live, aware of the world, but letting all of the bad stuff stop on the outside of me and only allowing the good stuff in?

A thought springs to mind. According to scientists, we are made up of millions of atoms. When an atom is examined, they find that it is composed of mostly space. In fact, there is a general agreement that the human body is roughly 99.999% empty space. That’s hard to believe. To think that a person we see with our eyes is actually mostly empty space.

What if the same is true of our hearts? What if we could shift our perception of the world and let what we consider to be the ‘bad stuff’ through the empty spaces inside our hearts so that we could focus on the ‘good stuff’? Could we give ourselves this precious permission?

I want to try. I want this because I sense the value and benefit it would offer me.

With my heart wide open, I would be able to hold on to the magnificence and the illuminating divine nature of life. And in that space, I could connect with others in ways I have not yet imagined.

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Cold Water

Are there times when you receive the same message over and over again? It may come from different sources, but the intent seems clear.

This happens to me every once in a while, and I’ve learned to pay attention and let the messages soak in. I allow them to roll around in my mind and see what they have to offer me. Most of the time, they are full of surprises and run off in numerous directions, but they always end up feeling important.

The most recent instance of this occurred a couple months ago. It started with my son, Tommy, mentioning a Netflix series titled, Limitless, that he thought I might find interesting. It was a brief series about Chris Hemsworth’s (yes, Thor) pursuit of improving the quality of his life by engaging in several different endeavors. Although I found the entire series fascinating, and Chris’s conviction, strength, and endurance remarkable, what really spoke to me was his cold-water experience.

After some preparatory training he ended up swimming in a wet suit through frigid water for a significant distance to test his physical and mental abilities to withstand the torturous swim out to a buoy and back. I am amazed by his passionate pursuit and his desire to improve and extend the quality of his life.

At the end of each episode Chris shares some of his ‘take-aways’ and mentioned that a part of his plan was to end his showers with 30 seconds of cold water. He’d learned that cold water enhances our immune system and he wanted to capitalize on that advantage.

I thought about this and decided that I wanted to do the same thing.

Soon after making this decision, I received five more confirming messages about the cold-water experience and its value.

Okay, I got it!

So, I began ending every one of my showers with 30 seconds of cold water, not only while standing with my back to the water, but another 30 seconds while facing the icy stream. WOW! Incredibly bracing!

I wondered whether I could stand doing this day after day. Did I have the stamina and the drive it would require? Only time would tell.

Fortunately, what I did have was a sense of purpose. I wanted the positive effects this experience would create by improving my immune system. I really wanted this.

It’s now been 70 days since I began, and I haven’t missed once. In fact, I’ve extended my times of exposure from 30 to 60 seconds per side. It takes enormous disciple on my part to do this every day, but I immediately feel the benefits and sense they have a compounding positive effect on my body.

I’m not sure if I’ll extend the time further, but I am planning on participating in the next Polar Plunge. This is an annual event held in Lake George (NY) in January, where participants swim in the freezing cold lake water. I’ve had this on my bucket list for a long time but have never been serious enough to pursue, until now.

So, what’s the point of this post if you’re not interested in ruining showers for the rest of your life? Well, for me, it represents a major change in what I think I am capable of. If I can do this hard thing, what other hard things can I do?

I’m now focusing some attention on my sleeping patterns and my breathwork. I know they need a lot of fine tuning and it’s great to know that I will be the recipient of whatever benefits happen. To know I am able to make lifestyle adjustments gives me hope and reminds me that I am in charge of my own life.

What hard things might you be capable of? What benefits might happen in your life if you make some changes?

As I discovered with the cold-water experience, I’d only know if I tried.

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Aims and Objectives

Do you have any aims and objectives in your life? If you were to list them, what would they be?

This question intrigued me, and I wanted to pursue it, but felt that first I needed to define both terms. Were they different or versions of the same idea?

After some thought I came up with the following.

Objectives felt like solid goals. They are definitive expectations which I pursue with the firm conviction of accomplishing them. They are measured by ‘completion’.

Aims felt more fluid. They are intentions that I set, with the hope of experiencing them. My aims are movements toward ‘progress’.

Once I sat back a bit, I could easily see how different these two concepts are. One is heavy and the other is light.

For me, aims and objectives set up a basic framework for my approach to life. What I have to share may connect with some of you, either because you feel the same way or because you know someone else who is like this.

When applying these concepts, I found that they have to become practical to mean anything to me. There has to be something specific to sink my teeth into.

I though back over my life and one truth became apparent to me.

In almost every case, objectives only felt valuable if I accomplished them all. Whenever there was something left undone, it plagued me and reduced my sense of self-worth.

In contrast, aims offered me flexibility, room to grow, and a way to alter my perspective about my pursuits. In short, they gave me freedom and allowed me the opportunity to enjoy the progress I experienced.

I thought I’d share an example with you from my life.

I used to be a White Knight.

A white knight is someone who feels the need to be a savior on some level. Although a white knight can be helpful to have around, they end up stealing other’s ability to stand on their own and only offer the white knight a sense of self-worth if they are rewarded by someone else.

As a white knight I felt it was my responsibility to save people, to please people, to right wrongs, and to protect the ‘little people’. These responsibilities created all of my objectives. And as you can probably guess, I was never wholly successful and as a consequence, I always experienced frustration and a continual depletion of my own worthiness.

It took many years for me to see clearly how this approach to life did not benefit me or anyone else. And yet, seeing something and doing something about it are two very different things.

I’m sure it wasn’t a change that happened in one singular moment, but that’s how it felt. There was a dawning and a major shift because at once, I knew that embracing ‘aims’ was my way forward. That, and being honest with myself, even if that meant moving into uncharted territory.

I realize my aims might sound unusual to you, but it’s truly what I feel, and it represents the light I aim to step into.

I aim to be a divine messenger. I aim to invite people to experience new thoughts and ideas. I aim to aid, encourage, and support folks during their earth walk. I aim to assist others with finding their own clarity and making choices which benefit them on their path through life. And I aim to experience JOY while in the flow of my own life.

Releasing objectives and embracing aims offers me a world of freedom and opens me fully.

My hope is that you find your own right path.

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What If You Were God

It happens every so often.

An idea comes out of nowhere. It generates a spark that ignites my curiosity and off I go, following the trail.

Does this ever happen to you? Do you get carried away, sensing there is something mysterious and amazing that could happen?

One day I was sitting with no particular plan, and I began to wonder what it would be like to be god and set the whole world in motion. It brought up so many questions, I could barely keep track.

A sort of conversation arose, different from any others I’d ever had. I wondered, could I put myself into god’s loving heart, and once there, could I explain myself so that everyone would know me? If I were god, how would I show my love to all those who walked the planet?

I considered, would I set limits and create requirements for living? Would I keep track of everything that was said, everything that was thought, every feeling experienced? Would I establish conditions and rules and if I did, what would my response be if the conditions and rules were breached?

Would I require adherence, devotion, abstinence? Would I be tolerant, accepting, doting? Would I punish, demand, withhold? Would I be forever open to forgiveness and offer constant hope to all?

These were mind boggling questions to consider and it seemed so difficult for me to formulate any kind of plan that would be fair and equitable. The number of exceptions would be astounding.

I thought some more. I wondered, would I continue to give gifts to the world? Would I send messengers to remind everyone of how much I loved them? Would I give each person ‘free will’, allowing them to make their own choices? Would there be any bounds to my love? Would I always listen, forgive, care?

Since I am a human being trying to put myself into the mind and heart of god, I fully recognize the limits of my understanding. I also realize that the nature of my questions reflects my own sensitivities to the world because one of my next questions was, as god, would I be loved in return? If as god, I was faithful to people, would they be faithful to me?

It was incredibly challenging to come up with any answers I felt were fair for all. It left me a little woozy and I needed a new perspective.

So, I asked god for some guidance, and here is what I heard.

“I will need to explain my answers, so give me a chance before you take anything the wrong way.”

I prepared myself to be patient and listen.

“I want nothing for you and nothing from you. You see, I don’t work from a set of obligations or specific expectations. I offer you freedom to choose whatever you wish. That, and the ability for your wishes to become real, to become your truth. You have the same creative force I do. You create an idea, a picture, a dream, and you speak it and act it into your reality, just as I do. I do not ‘wish’ things into your life, because I’ve shared the gift of creation with you, so that you can bring about whatever you desire. But you see, that is your greatest gift and your greatest challenge, because the world cannot distinguish between your thoughts and your actions. It gives you exactly what you request. If you look clearly, you can see this in other’s lives and if you look deeper still, you can see it in your own. Before you arrived here, you had within your spirit essence, the gifts of creativity and freedom to choose from every possible choice. You have this still and always will, and this worlds experiences teach you how to use these gifts wisely.”

Wow!

And god ended by saying, “I love you and will always co-create with you toward this awareness. Be at peace in this knowing.”

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A Diet of Words

I want to choose to use good words every day. Why is that so hard for me? Why am I so tempted to use harmful words to say to others and to myself?

According to one source on the internet, we speak about 7,000 words a day. These are the ones we speak out loud, so that others can hear them.

It makes me wonder; how many words do we say to ourselves in a day? More importantly, what are the words? What do they convey to us? Are they helpful, neutral, or hurtful?

I also wonder; what is their relationship to our physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual life? Does each word have weight? I mean this both figuratively and literally. Do certain words weight more than others?

Are the words we choose to say defining us and our experience here on this earth?

Suppose we decide to speak, outwardly or inwardly, words that offer us support and reassurance, would they weigh less than words that condemn or shame us?

If we made a list, what words would offer us hope and set us free? Once created, would we be able to say them to ourselves, and mean them? What would enhance our ability to choose and embrace them?

To me, these are all important questions, because they prompt me to consider my choices, knowing full well that my answers create my experiences.

If I want to produce great results in my life, the words I choose to speak matter. What I say reinforces my actions and what I want to have happen in my life, whether it’s releasing weight from my body, my mind, my heart, or my spirit.

What I say can make it easier or impossible.

I sense the dawning of another question. I wonder what would happen if I released all of the words that don’t support me? I recognize there are so many of these. I’ve already shifted away from one of the cruelest words I know…’should’. I don’t use it anymore because it hurts too much. It hurts me and it hurts anyone I say it to. Its destructive power is immense.

So, if you are game to try something with me, let’s take a moment and write down some words that best support us and our grandest vision of who we want to be. I’m aiming for seven words to start with, but you can pick whatever number seems best to you.

Okay, here are my seven and why I chose them.

  1. Yes (an affirmation of life and a word to be used with other words to accomplish and enjoy things in my life)
  2. Love (the most affirming word in our language, love for others and love for myself)
  3. Gratitude (for what I am experiencing in my life)
  4. Possible (as in, everything is possible, within reach, offering a sense of hope)
  5. Faith (in both things seen and unseen)
  6. Trust (that I am loved, safe, able, connected)
  7. Belief (that I am in charge of what I believe and can make changes when I need to, reshaping my world)

Now I wonder, what would happen if I kept this list of words in places where I could see them. What would happen if I used these words more often than any others? And what would happen if I spoke these words out loud?

What I believe is that it would make an enormous difference, both to me and to those around me. I would be healthier, happier, and lighter. This is what I would like words to do for me.