Every so often I get stuck in a thinking loop and can’t get out.
Has that ever happened to you? Something seems to keep playing over and over and won’t let go, sort of like when gum gets stuck on the bottom of your sneaker. Ugh!
In this case, it was more of a ‘phrase’ that got attached to my brain. It repeated and forced me to consider it in more depth, even though I just wanted to get past it.
The phrase was, ‘as soon as you don’t need it, it can happen’.
There wasn’t any particular ‘it’ that I was thinking about. ‘It’ was just a general thought and could stand for anything.
I wanted to dispatch this notion and move on, but I couldn’t, so I surrendered and began to pick the phrase apart.
I was shocked by the depth this statement held for me and wondered if it might hold some value for you, as well.
My temptation was to read it quickly, as if I would inherently understand its meaning. As I struggled with it, I tried inserting different things for the ‘it’, for instance; ‘as soon as you don’t need others help, it can happen (they will help you).’
Hmmm, did that fit at all? My response…not really. There didn’t seem to be a direct connection I could see.
I tried another one, ‘as soon as you don’t need money, it can happen (money will appear)’. There were a couple of things wrong with this. First, who doesn’t need money? Second, if I didn’t need money, what difference would it make if it appeared?
Something was definitely missing, but what?
I tried other substitutions without any success. Perhaps I was going about it the wrong way. Maybe the value was in deconstructing the phrase, so I picked it apart, starting with the word, ‘need’. That seemed to be the key.
‘Need’ is a deep word to me, representing a statement of what I think or feel I want. But why do I want something? Where does the ‘need’ come from?
Clearly, ‘need’ represents an acknowledgement that I am missing something in my life. Whatever word I use in a sentence that follows the word ‘need’, becomes my focus. It represents a lack in my life.
So, what’s the connection that gives rise to meaning here?
After some more struggle I realized, I was trying too hard. I was overthinking. When I do this, I have to coach myself to step back and look at things from a distance. So, I closed my eyes and slowed my breathing and after a few minutes I came back to it.
And there it was, right in front of me.
‘Need’ for me is a loaded word. Every time I use it, it places some distance between me and the object of my need. The mere usage of the word prevents my need from being filled.
‘Need’ acknowledges ‘not having’ and ‘wanting’. It is self-fulfilling and all I end up with is a greater sense of ‘needing’, as if my initial ‘need’ creates more every time I think about it or say it. ‘Need’ blocks access and saps my energy.
Initially, I didn’t understand the ramification of this. It was only when I reached deeper into it that the meaning arose.
The phrase, ‘as soon as you don’t need it, it can happen’ became two sentences, not one.
And it offered me this…surrendering my ‘need’ frees me to receive and it unblocks my way forward. It allows me to think about things from another perspective, one that is creative and energetic. I can rephrase and direct my attention to helpful ideas and solutions that benefit me.
I’m glad I worked my way through this pesky phrase and hope it offers you some meaning too.