Your Real Name

Have you ever lived out in nature? I mean far away from ‘civilization’? Without electricity or running water? Growing your own food?

I haven’t. The closest I’ve come is canoe camping, where a buddy of mine and I went to a lake and skimmed across the water with only what our canoe could hold.

We set up camp on an island and as night fell the sky became inky black. That’s when the magic happened. Without any ambient light anywhere, we were treated to the most spectacular light show of my life. A million, million stars, shinning everywhere in the sky. Unforgettable.

It made me wonder what it must have been like before electricity and campfires.

A time when everything happened according to a rhythm nature was in charge of. Turning off the sun’s rays but leaving on a soft night light high up in the sky with just enough brightness to dream by.

I wonder if I would ever trade all of my conveniences for a life measured out by mother nature. A life where I lived in the present moment, in tune with my surroundings and aware of my small, yet special place in the world.

One of the questions that comes to me when I give myself permission is, what name would I choose to call myself?

If you were out there in a world where nature was queen, what would you ask her to call you?

This is no small thing.

A name means something. Without one, who are you? How are you distinguished from others that roam the earth?

And then I think, what name can say who I am? What name can connect me to others and to their worlds?

I search inside to find my true name. Not the one given to me at birth by my parents. That is the name they wished to call me. I accepted it as my own because I didn’t know I could name myself. No one ever told me I could.

But now I think it’s time to find my name. I feel a real need, a hunger.

I wonder, how does one go about this task?

I sense there is real significance here for me.

If you were sitting here next to me, I would ask you what you think. Are you drawn to wanting to choose a new name for yourself, even if no one else calls you this? Might it mean something to you to know in your own heart who you really are?

I can’t escape thinking about this.

Do I choose a name that describes my physical appearance, something like, Tall Standing Tree? Or maybe, a word that draws out one of my strengths, like Clear Seer? Perhaps, I could choose a name of something I want to be, but am not now, to give myself room to grow, like Great Light?

These names seem to miss the mark.

I know I have to leave my head to find my name. I know my real name lives inside my heart. It is the only place I will find it. So, I go there, in search of who I am to ME. I am not looking for anyone else but ME.

I sink inside and wait. If it’s time, I believe my name will find me.

I hear a sound. An absolutely delightful sound. It is the sound of my name. Not a word, as I expected. A sound I feel and remember. The sound of running water. That is who I am. No wonder I was attracted to nature. It’s where I live. I wonder if you can somehow feel your real name. I hope you do